Birds, College and foster homes

[PrettyBirdy]

Hi! I am a high school senior, and although I am taking a gap year, I am trying to think ahead as much as possible. I have 3 birds: a gcc, a bebe parrot, and a goffins cockatoo. Luckily, my G2 is just as (or more) bonded to my father, so leaving her is no problem. I'll miss her like crazy, but she will be fine. My GCC will most likely come with me, he is the QUIETEST bird I have ever known, and being in a dorm won't bother him one bit.

My bebe is another story.... He was abused before I got him, and so his first reaction to humans, is fear. He loses trust very quickly. I am really the only person he wants to be with, and if he is out of his cage, and not with me, he has very bad separation anxiety. He used to be comfortable with my Dad as well, but as I mentioned, it is not hard to lose his trust, and my father (who is a fantastic bird person) made a simple misstep about a year and a half ago, and ever since, Sam doesn't let himself be near him. We have worked HARD to try and heal the break, but he just doesn't trust him.

I would bring Sam, without a second thought, if he wasn't so loud. He is not destructive, he is fairly easy to keep busy, but he simply talks a lot. His voice isn't particularly loud, but it is so frequent... I just am not sure he would be okay in a dorm/apartment.

It breaks my heart. I can't leave him at home, he would be so scared, and lonely, and it's just not an option...

So, after some serious thinking, I am considering trying to find someone to temporarily foster him for about a year. Someone with lots of patience and experience.

I was wondering if anyone has any experience with this kind of situation? Any suggestions on this or other options? He is my baby, my whole heart, and leaving him even for a year (with visits) is the hardest thing i've every even considered...I am desperate for a solution.

Thanks.

 

[Featheredfuffs]

Im sorry... Don't have much experience with the foster situation... however, if you do decide to, maybe try the yahoo Brotogeris parrot groups? Someone on there may be able to help out as it is dedicated entirely to Bebe/canary wing/ other brotogeris parakeet lovers

I hope you find a good solution. I have a little bebe myself and as I'm just a few years younger than you, I'm worried I'll be put in the same situation.

 

[faislaq]

Any members on here have any experience with soundproofing? If it's not cost-prohibitive or toxic you might be able to soundproof (& probably sound absorb) the room the birds will be in. Hopefully there are some inexpensive DIY hacks somewhere online.

 

[Begone]

I would bring Sam, without a second thought, if he wasn't so loud. He is not destructive, he is fairly easy to keep busy, but he simply talks a lot. His voice isn't particularly loud, but it is so frequent... I just am not sure he would be okay in a dorm/apartment.

I would take him with me and see what happens. "To talk a lot" it's not sure that your neighbors will hear at all. And they can also be bird people.
You just don't know until you tried.

 

[PrettyBirdy]

I would take him with me and see what happens. "To talk a lot" it's not sure that your neighbors will hear at all. And they can also be bird people.
You just don't know until you tried.

i would agree, but if i do get in trouble for his noise, i don't want it to effect my GCC. if Sam is being particularly loud, and I am told I can't keep him there, people might jump to conclusions about Remmy. I know the college i'm looking at the most has someone that brought their bird, but i'm not sure what kind.... And I should clarify: "talking" isn't just small little chirps...they aren't full on screams either, but they can definitely can carry through walls.

 

[PrettyBirdy]

Im sorry... Don't have much experience with the foster situation... however, if you do decide to, maybe try the yahoo Brotogeris parrot groups? Someone on there may be able to help out as it is dedicated entirely to Bebe/canary wing/ other brotogeris parakeet lovers

I hope you find a good solution. I have a little bebe myself and as I'm just a few years younger than you, I'm worried I'll be put in the same situation.

Thank you for the group suggestion! Glad to know it exists, you don't see to many of these beauties around.

 

[faislaq]

We couldn't handle the pitch from the bebe that we took in -it was even more ear splitting than our macaw! Our next door neighbors in our building adopted him and I never hear him from our side of the wall, only occasionally as I walk past their front door. I think even though bebe's have a higher frequency there might not be as much force (intensity? sound pressure?) behind it as the bigger birds. (I hope someone who understands the physics of sound can help me?)

So like @Eloy said, Sam might not be a problem as long as you're allowed to have birds, but I don't think you could quite keep him a secret.

 

[faislaq]

but they can definitely can carry through walls.

Dang it. I was hoping they didn't carry that well. Maybe our building is just super quiet? That would explain no complaints about Buzzy, though.

 

[PrettyBirdy]

We couldn't handle the pitch from the bebe that we took in -it was even more ear splitting than our macaw! Our next door neighbors in our building adopted him and I never hear him from our side of the wall, only occasionally as I walk past their front door. I think even though bebe's have a higher frequency there might not be as much force (intensity? sound pressure?) behind it as the bigger birds. (I hope someone who understands the physics of sound can help me?)

So like @Eloy said, Sam might not be a problem as long as you're allowed to have birds, but I don't think you could quite keep him a secret.

It is really incredible the difference. My goffins is well... she's a cockatoo, so naturally, she has her loud moments, but i'd much rather her scream in my ear than Sam.

That is interesting to know... I have a few friends in apartments, I might bring him over and run some tests on that.

All good information!!

 

[PrettyBirdy]

Dang it. I was hoping they didn't carry that well. Maybe our building is just super quiet? That would explain no complaints about Buzzy, though.

It carries in my parents house, but it is an old building.. so it might be worth looking into.

 

[Tiel Feathers]

What kind of misstep did your dad have with Sam? I would think that he could still have a relationship with him, especially if you are not home. I think the least stressful situation for Sam would be to stay in the home he knows. Fostering for him will feel like he lost his home, and could be very stressful and make him more insecure than he already is. Staying in his current situation, even with his favorite person gone, would be far less stressful. Would you come home on holidays, etc?

 

[faislaq]

What kind of misstep did your dad have with Sam? I would think that he could still have a relationship with him, especially if you are not home. I think the least stressful situation for Sam would be to stay in the home he knows. Fostering for him will feel like he lost his home, and could be very stressful and make him more insecure than he already is. Staying in his current situation, even with his favorite person gone, would be far less stressful. Would you come home on holidays, etc?

This would be the cheapest and easiest solution. You're planning a gap year. Could you become a Birdie Bread Baker lvl 100 and have only your dad give it to them? You don't need to score any points, but it could help Dad's reputation. Bring on the bribes!

 

[finchly]

Just a little warning. YOu say the GCC will be ‘fine’ but you might not be thinking of HIS well being. My cockatiel Torrie was sold to a college student as a baby, and bonded quickly to her owner but woudn’t eat. I think dorm life was too stressful for her. Fortunately I got her, and she ate fine for me!

Also - could you possibly live in an apartment, maybe even with roommates, or would your parents spring for a condo for your college years? That way you could keep your babies safely.

 

[PrettyBirdy]

Just a little warning. YOu say the GCC will be ‘fine’ but you might not be thinking of HIS well being. My cockatiel Torrie was sold to a college student as a baby, and bonded quickly to her owner but woudn’t eat. I think dorm life was too stressful for her. Fortunately I got her, and she ate fine for me!

Also - could you possibly live in an apartment, maybe even with roommates, or would your parents spring for a condo for your college years? That way you could keep your babies safely.

I am definitely thinking of his well being. I have had him since he was a baby, and as much as I know there are variables, what I meant by fine, was that his personality doesn't have the same obvious challenges that my bebe does. Obviously if I take him, and he stops eating or something I would do whatever it took to rectify that situation. If he was unhappy in anyway, I would not keep him with me, just for myself. I would bring him home.

And an apartment would likely come with the s.same problem. I would still have a loud fid, and share a wall.

Also: we are trying to get a one bedroom dorm so roommates wouldn't be an issue.

 

[PrettyBirdy]

What kind of misstep did your dad have with Sam? I would think that he could still have a relationship with him, especially if you are not home. I think the least stressful situation for Sam would be to stay in the home he knows. Fostering for him will feel like he lost his home, and could be very stressful and make him more insecure than he already is. Staying in his current situation, even with his favorite person gone, would be far less stressful. Would you come home on holidays, etc?

Sam has a lot of anxiety with food, and I'm the only one he doesn't panic with, when taking his food dish to wash and stuff. My well intentioned father, who does sometimes feed my goffins and gcc but never Sam, decided to feed him. When he was removing his dish, Sam got defensive and flew at his hand, and my dad, acting on instinct, pulled back with the dish in hand, and Sam ended up taking a bit of a tumble. It didn't hurt him one bit, but he really read it as a betrayal of sorts. Even after my dad returned with food, Sam just attacked him, and ever since, he is soo defensive with my dad. We've worked at it, and after a month or two, my dad could hand feed him seed and other treats between the bars of his cage, but its been over a year, and theres been no more progress.

The reason I think fostering would be better has three reasons: 1) He's not a huge fan of my cockatoo (she's the newest. we got her in September) so she doesn't add any comfort. 2) When he meets someone there is about a 10 minute window to start a relationship with him, and while I am definitely trusted the most, he doesn't have the same absolute defensive fear that he has with my dad, with everyone, it just takes time and work. and 3) my mother really, really doesn't like him. I'm honestly not sure why. But I don't want to leave him with a bird he's not a fan of, a person who he is actively afraid of, and someone with no interest in him.

Also: as I said, my dad feeds him all the time through his cage. all treats, almost every day, and nothings changed. He really knows how to hold a grudge..

 

[PrettyBirdy]

Thank you to everyone who has given me advice thus far!!

 

[finchly]

I am definitely thinking of his well being. I have had him since he was a baby, and as much as I know there are variables, what I meant by fine, was that his personality doesn't have the same obvious challenges that my bebe does. Obviously if I take him, and he stops eating or something I would do whatever it took to rectify that situation. If he was unhappy in anyway, I would not keep him with me, just for myself. I would bring him home.

And an apartment would likely come with the s.same problem. I would still have a loud fid, and share a wall.

Also: we are trying to get a one bedroom dorm so roommates wouldn't be an issue.

I didn’t mean to offend.

 

[PrettyBirdy]

I didn’t mean to offend.

I wasn't offended, sorry if it came off that way, just thought I should clarify.

 

[finchly]

I wasn't offended, sorry if it came off that way, just thought I should clarify.

I just wanted to be sure.

 

[Monica]

Since you believe that a long term foster situation would be best for Sam, have you got any serious considerations for where he may be fostered? I understand that you are really just in the beginning stages of thinking this all out and you may not have gotten that far yet, but perhaps maybe you've got some ideas?