Paco passed Jan 5, 2022

[Tyrion]

So sorry for your loss

 

[Snowghost]

Thank you everyone, I'm just lost.

 

[zoo mom]

I lost Andre (BH Pionus) in November. I still find it hard to get things done. For several weeks I had trouble even spending time in the bird room., even with 5 other birds.

 

[zoo mom]

(Sorry about multiple posts my phone doesn't like AA right now)



Thank goodness my husband Who isn't really into the birds was willing to step up and do bird care.
I am finally to the point where I can be in the bird room and not break into tears.

 

[zoo mom]

But I still have difficulty making myself do things that I know need to be done. I would rather just curl up in the recliner and disassociate with the world. Definitely depressed. Take all the time you need, and vent as much as necessary for you. We will be here for you.

 

[Snowghost]

"I'll lend you, for a little while, a bird of mine," He said.
"For you to love while he lives, and mourn when he is dead.​

It may be six or seven years, or maybe twenty-three,
But will you, till I call him back, take care of him for me?​

He'll bring his charms to gladden you, and shall his stay be brief,
You'll have his lovely memories as solace for your grief.​

I cannot promise he will stay, as all from Earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there I want this bird to learn.​

I've looked the whole world over in my search for teachers true,
And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes, I have selected you.​

Now will you give him all your love - not think this labor vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call, to take him back again.​

I fancied that I heard them say, 'Dear Lord, thy will be done.'
For all the joy this bird shall bring, the risk of grief we'll run.​

We'll shower him with tenderness and love while we may,
And for the happiness we've known, forever grateful stay.​

And should the angels call for him much sooner than we planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes, and try to understand."​

If, by your love, you've managed, my wishes to achieve,
In memory of him you've loved; be thankful; do not grieve. ​

Cherish every moment of your feathered charge.
He filled your home with songs of joy the time he was alive.
Let not his passing take from you those memories to enjoy. ​

"I will lend to you, a Bird", God said, and teach you all you have to do.
And when I call him back to heaven, you will know he loved you too. ​

~Author unknown​

 

[zoo mom]

@Snowghost I have read this before but it most definitely deserves to be read again.

 

[Snowghost]

It seemed to really ease my pain the tears have finally stopped. It is a very healing poem.

 

[Icey]

Wow! That poem is really beautiful and I am so happy you're beginning to find peace.

 

[Snowghost]

Thank you all so much.

 

[Tilly123]

I am so sorry for you loss. It is so terribly painful when suddenly our little friends are no longer with us. I lost my Amazon just over 3 years ago. I miss him dreadfully every day.
You have had a great shock...it will take time for that shock to process. It is hard but slowly you will remember the good times and the grief will not seem so raw.
Your birds will be looking over you with love .
May they stay in your heart for always .

 

[Snowghost]

Thank you, I miss him terribly, everything I do reminds me of him.

 

[Tilly123]

I did a few things to help me cope but the main thing that helped me was that I wrote down every single thing I could remember about him. What he said, what he did, the tunes he whistling, his favourite foods...everything. I still add things to my 'memory book' even now.
I just didn't want to forget anything about him. It helped because it kept my mind occupied and also it helped because it was my way of keeping him alive in my memory.
Occasionally I will read the memories,although sometimes I can't because it still makes me sad. Other times I smile when I read the funny, sweet things that he used to say and do. I still have guilt and regret about what I should have/could have done when he was here but I know that he had a happy home with me. We loved each other very much.
The grief when they pass is immense.
You will get through this. It is hard but nothing can take the love and the memories away from you. You gave Paco a wonderful life.
I am thinking of you at this sad time. Please don't be afraid to post on this forum. We are here to support you.

 

[Snowghost]

Thank you for your kind words. I don't think I will need a memory book, I appreciate the suggestion. I have an incredible memory, sometimes I wish I didn't, LOL. His antics, whistles and chatter are burned in my heart and soul he will be forever in my thoughts.

Today I just feel sad. I think I have finally cried myself out. I screamed, I beat on pillows anything to release the pain.

I am so thankful for this group, and I hope I haven't worn out my welcome.

 

[Clueless]

@Snowghost nobody wears out their welcome here.

@Tilly123 I like the idea of a memory book. I might do that for MC. My memory isn't as good as @Snowghost

 

[Snowghost]

Thank you @Clueless, I don't know what to do, I can't eat, I don't feel like doing anything. I am sitting my bedroom, I don't to participate in life. I'm sooo sad. I can't even think of getting another bird. I can't go through this heart break again, but its so quiet. The silence is killing me. Everyone says do what you love, I loved taking care of Paco and now he is gone. I have no reason to do anything. I'm lost and don't know how to cope with these feelings. I can't turn off being sad.

 

[Clueless]

I did a lot of walking outside.

Perhaps you should consider seeing a therapist. I did that, too, after losing MC. I had been through a lot in my life without that. . . but I was persuaded to try counseling. It did help. The first person wasn't a fit but the 2nd one I saw did help.

 

[Snowghost]

I did a lot of walking outside.

Perhaps you should consider seeing a therapist. I did that, too, after losing MC. I had been through a lot in my life without that. . . but I was persuaded to try counseling. It did help. The first person wasn't a fit but the 2nd one I saw did help.

I do see a therapist, I'm going to send you a PM.

 

[zoo mom]

I am still at the point where I have to push myself to do anything. I would rather curl in my recliner and avoid the world.

 

[Snowghost]

I am still at the point where I have to push myself to do anything. I would rather curl in my recliner and avoid the world.

So you know how it feels, thank you, I don't feel so alone now. Tell me about your baby.