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Baby to adult. Will they still love me?

LaSelva

Jogging around the block
Avenue Veteran
Joined
5/22/12
Messages
887
Real Name
David
Honestly, I would wait a few years until your babies have at least gone through puberty.
There's a book out called "Parrots of the Wild" that has a section on the ages of reproductive readiness for various parrot species.

I don't have the book in front of me at the moment but if I remember correctly parrots that are approximately the size of a green cheek conure or smaller are sexually mature and active by the next breeding season after hatching.

As for the larger birds (like macaws) it doesn't take years for them to become sexually mature in the biological sense. They are sexually mature much earlier but what happens is they are not "behaviorally" ready to breed. They form pair bonds early in life (post fledgling) and will spend years together, synchronizing their behavior, becomming skilled (at finding food, etc.), and will even "play house" (by claiming nest sites and going through the motions) only to abandon the effort.

It's amazing how so much of their lives is geared towards mate selection and reproduction, beginning with their first learned vocalizations in the nest.
 

Pyropus

Walking the driveway
Joined
3/10/20
Messages
193
Downloaded sample for kindle, will buy it when the dollar goes down if I like what I see..aka thanks for the tip ;)

Dont have birds yet, but seeing this tread just seem to sum up the whole stance on dont choose your pet by looks, species and then breed need to be picked on your personality, what rolle you want it to fill in your life, and what you and your lifestyle can give to the animal.

And even then when it comes to picking the individual you need to know what you are looking for if you are wanting something very specific and not interested in taking whatever experience you will get. Example is allowing the breeder or seller into picking the rigth animal for you or your lifestyle.

I had various species in my life, I had those I rehomed for what was best for the animal, those where my household been the second home, or those where the household was a temporary home on the way to the forever home or back to original home.I also worked with and helped care for others animals, or been responsible for animals partly or fully in periods for research.

If you havent gone through the motions of why you want an animal, and what fit your lifestyle your much more likely to end up with the wrong animal. For some geting a young animal is right, for others an adult. Either way you need to expect that it wont go pitch perfect, its a living beeing, they got their own personality, and just as with people personality can change throughout life. Its not a rigth or wrong, but being honest about what is rigth and wrong for you and the animal.

Also sorry but in my opinion there is not always dogs, there is a reason shelters are overrun with dogs, people get cute litle puppies of the wrong breed or just to have a dog period for the wrong reasons, just like with what many say with parrots here the dog dont get what it needs, and grows up with all types of behaviour issues they arent equiped to handle and they abandon it. And I seen all kinds of personalities in dogs also, no they wont nesicarily love you unintentionally, they can pick favourites, they can become offended, they can even bond to one person so strongly they refuse to listen to others and mostly ignore the rest of the family, and not all like to be petted other then when it suits them and so on.

There is no live animal that gives you any guranties, need a programmable robot animal for that. And hickups are to be expected, to not expect that you are going to have to work through problems and bad behaviour at one time or another is a bit blue eyed (afterall point me to the human who never had problems or bad habits, its part of life).
 

Lillybust

Meeting neighbors
Joined
3/28/20
Messages
22
Real Name
Pamela
I've been pondering this for some time now. What will my hand reared babies think of me as they mature? Will I always own their hearts? What if not...:(

Now as my parrots are entering fully mature status I'm learning the answers to my questions. My Too is 17, my Zon is 13, and my GW is 12.

Two of them I got right before the weaning age, and did the weaning. My Macaw I fed from 5 weeks.

So far two of them are switching their affections. Solomon my amazon did so long ago, he loves my daughters, and accepts me. When my girls are home, I leave my feisty greenie alone!

Sweden my Goffin has begun looking for a love interest. I am not it. :( She also loves my daughters to death, and is even courting new folk these days. When alone her and I get along fine. But lately (last several years), she's taken to going on the attack if I dare to get between her and her new interests. In the last two days, I've gotten two bites. One on my neck (she flew at me), another on my hand as she pounced on me. My daughter moved back home this week, so these attacks are intensifying.

I'm glad she's not a U2 or M2. I can see how terrifying a large attacking Too would be. She does calm down, and I can handle her when she does so. But while she's in this intense state, I dare not approach her, or be sure to have a towel/blanket in hand if I do.

I think this stage will get worse before it gets better (if it even does).

Chaos is my youngest, and is also showing maturing behavior. He though has no one to switch his affections to, as he and my daughters have not so good relationships. He must deal with me, and only me. As it is, we now almost never snuggle, I am permitted head petting, but not much more. He keeps me at a distance. My knee is a good perch, but my arms are not to wrap around him.

I've grown with all of my birds, watched these changes slowly occur, and even sort of expected them. They still are not easy to accept. I am not hurt badly though, I've done so much research I've not been taken by surprise by their change in affections. And I still have their friendship most of the time, if not their undying devotion.

What I would do differently if I could.

I'd not buy a baby! I wanted companions to age with. I didn't want bird children to rear and have leave me! :p

How many uninformed owners though will have this happen and not know what hits them? How hard it must be to have your loved bird of 10 years suddenly start to attack you. I can see why so many birds of this age are up for adoption.

The dream of having a loving flock for life is slowly evaporating. I wonder how things will be in another 10 years. Will their attitude towards me turn to hate as their frustrations worsen? Will they calm down and accept their 'mom' is all they'll ever have?

Is rehoming a bird you've raised from a baby better for the bird? Will they be happier leaving the nest, and forming a new different relationship?

I wish I knew. :huh:

If anyone else is going through this, or has been through it and knows answers to my questions, I'd love to hear from you.
Has anyone else ever worried about this happening?

Life is ever changing. How do we help ourselves and our birds deal with it?
These birds are really wild animals.. they don’t get spayed or neutered.. babies are always great!!!!! It’s a hard life for the birds.. I’ve had to stick with small parrots lovebirds mainly for this reason.. Had to rehome my parrotlets cause the female cane from a rescue and was so cage aggressive it took forever to clean her cage.. I couldnt keep a Goffins because of the psycho behavior.. one minute loving and the next on attack.. the lovebirds are never a problem getting in their cage and feeding them... I just can’t be frightened of my birds.. it’s too stressful! Sounds like you are handling things very well though...
 

keikoasmom

Walking the driveway
Avenue Veteran
Joined
8/24/11
Messages
178
Location
Aurora, CO
Real Name
Linda
I think the relationships evolve, just like human relationships, and as someone
else said, "It depends on the bird."
Keikoa is my baby, I got to handle her more as a baby, feeding and so on, than my husband.
He had to be away part of the time, So I am "Mom". I think she feels that way. She cuddles and
looks to me when there are issues (like an illness/injury 2 years ago). She loves her Daddy, and they have
a special bond. But just as with my real kids, Mom is Mom, no one can replace your mom.:)

Bubo was nearly the same age, from our Bird Lady, but we didn't notice her or know anything about Goffins
until about 3 months after Keikoa was home. We went to adopt a Yellow Nape that we loved, who was not adopted when his
twin was....but he had become a biter, and we were too new to know how to handle that. Bubo jumped onto my arm
and started saying, "Wacket-a-wacketa-wacka! Who could say no? On the way home, she started screaming,.
We had no idea......she is our baby, also, and loves me, she loves EVERYONE!She screams a lot, but she adores my hubby,
and although she seems a bit "mentally challenged" at times, she is so sweet and affectionate....

Brandy belonged to an acquaintance of friends. The first time I helpd her, I nearly cried on the way home,
she was so sweet and loving. Six months later, the owners let her go, gave her back to the "Bird Lady" coincidentally
on a day when my hubby was there. She loves us both. I think she knows we "saved her",she is VERY affectionate, and
loves us both. She gets "sexy" with hubby if he forgets and pets her on her back, and she ADORES our 23 year
old grandson, up-chucking on him!

Friday, unfortunately, was not raised well. I mean, not enough love and teaching. Her owner was a teen boy who went off to collecge,
The partents took over, but it seems that Friday was a "living sculpture" more than a companion. We got her when she was 26. She doesn't like me, and I feel she almost sees me as competition for husband and our sons. She loves men. She lets me feed her and give her skritches
when she is in her cage, AM and PM, but we have had her for 10+ years and I have made little progress. I keep telling her I
love her, and she continues to roll her eyes. The one time I forgot "my place", coming home from a long road trip,
she nailed me, got my thumb almost to the bone. So I use a stick to pick her up, and don't let my guard down

Lovey is a delight, except for the things that macaws do.....we got her when she was 26, same as Friday. Her owners were
clients of my friend who got us interested in birds initially. Lovey was in a round cage that was too narrow for her,
with no toys. I sent over toys, and my friend talked to the couple....the wife had Alzheimer's, and eventually
they asked her to rehome Lovey. She is missing over 50% of her feathers, and has had some ill-treatment. I think she loved her lady, but the hubby was a bit over-strict. She was a bit shocked to find herself in a new home, but loved her huge cage....until
she decided she loved me. The first time I touched her face (I just HAD to find out what the white part felt like!) she purred.
She became MY bird, and although she likes hubby, especially because he eats a lot, (haha) she doesn't cuddle with him.
After 10 years, though, he can pick her up without a stick, so he is ahead of where I am with Friday.
She started screaming about a year ago....I think she finally felt like this is HER home, and had something to say
Mostly, "FEED ME!" A macaw's screams are terrifying.
I think she is learning that we don't like it,
but.....
we love our menagerie. They each have a different personality, and we ALL have to remember that parrots
are WILD ANIMALS. Sometimes they are just "being birds".
At the same time, they respond to love and kindness, and they love and respect people who treat them well.
As far as I can see, they never forget people who are mean or abusive or scary.

Sorry for the book!
 

Lillybust

Meeting neighbors
Joined
3/28/20
Messages
22
Real Name
Pamela
I think the relationships evolve, just like human relationships, and as someone
else said, "It depends on the bird."
Keikoa is my baby, I got to handle her more as a baby, feeding and so on, than my husband.
He had to be away part of the time, So I am "Mom". I think she feels that way. She cuddles and
looks to me when there are issues (like an illness/injury 2 years ago). She loves her Daddy, and they have
a special bond. But just as with my real kids, Mom is Mom, no one can replace your mom.:)

Bubo was nearly the same age, from our Bird Lady, but we didn't notice her or know anything about Goffins
until about 3 months after Keikoa was home. We went to adopt a Yellow Nape that we loved, who was not adopted when his
twin was....but he had become a biter, and we were too new to know how to handle that. Bubo jumped onto my arm
and started saying, "Wacket-a-wacketa-wacka! Who could say no? On the way home, she started screaming,.
We had no idea......she is our baby, also, and loves me, she loves EVERYONE!She screams a lot, but she adores my hubby,
and although she seems a bit "mentally challenged" at times, she is so sweet and affectionate....

Brandy belonged to an acquaintance of friends. The first time I helpd her, I nearly cried on the way home,
she was so sweet and loving. Six months later, the owners let her go, gave her back to the "Bird Lady" coincidentally
on a day when my hubby was there. She loves us both. I think she knows we "saved her",she is VERY affectionate, and
loves us both. She gets "sexy" with hubby if he forgets and pets her on her back, and she ADORES our 23 year
old grandson, up-chucking on him!

Friday, unfortunately, was not raised well. I mean, not enough love and teaching. Her owner was a teen boy who went off to collecge,
The partents took over, but it seems that Friday was a "living sculpture" more than a companion. We got her when she was 26. She doesn't like me, and I feel she almost sees me as competition for husband and our sons. She loves men. She lets me feed her and give her skritches
when she is in her cage, AM and PM, but we have had her for 10+ years and I have made little progress. I keep telling her I
love her, and she continues to roll her eyes. The one time I forgot "my place", coming home from a long road trip,
she nailed me, got my thumb almost to the bone. So I use a stick to pick her up, and don't let my guard down

Lovey is a delight, except for the things that macaws do.....we got her when she was 26, same as Friday. Her owners were
clients of my friend who got us interested in birds initially. Lovey was in a round cage that was too narrow for her,
with no toys. I sent over toys, and my friend talked to the couple....the wife had Alzheimer's, and eventually
they asked her to rehome Lovey. She is missing over 50% of her feathers, and has had some ill-treatment. I think she loved her lady, but the hubby was a bit over-strict. She was a bit shocked to find herself in a new home, but loved her huge cage....until
she decided she loved me. The first time I touched her face (I just HAD to find out what the white part felt like!) she purred.
She became MY bird, and although she likes hubby, especially because he eats a lot, (haha) she doesn't cuddle with him.
After 10 years, though, he can pick her up without a stick, so he is ahead of where I am with Friday.
She started screaming about a year ago....I think she finally felt like this is HER home, and had something to say
Mostly, "FEED ME!" A macaw's screams are terrifying.
I think she is learning that we don't like it,
but.....
we love our menagerie. They each have a different personality, and we ALL have to remember that parrots
are WILD ANIMALS. Sometimes they are just "being birds".
At the same time, they respond to love and kindness, and they love and respect people who treat them well.
As far as I can see, they never forget people who are mean or abusive or scary.

Sorry for the book!
Wow! That is an amazing story! You are so fortunate to have a partner who shares in all of your bird adventures! These birds are such amazing creatures and to be able to share our lives with them is such a gift and an absolutely amazing thing about living on planet earth! I am so thankful you saved the ones who had been mistreated. It can be a very hard life for them....
 

clarousel

Rollerblading along the road
Joined
6/18/20
Messages
1,440
Location
Singapore
I thoroughly enjoyed reading all 8 pages of this thread!

I have seen a gender preference in my cocker spaniel (passed now and she loved men haha) so I'm not surprised that birds may prefer the opposite gender in humans!

Just wondering if all this is relevant for budgies?

I have one that is only 3 months old and I'm both excited and nervous to see how she will be like as she grows up. I took her around 5 weeks and I think I was weaning her because she didn't want formula and was learning to hull seeds within the next few days. She socialised with my dad and sis when she wasn't flighted yet and easily steps up to them now. She's also friendly (even at the vet).

My family doesn't have a big interest in her but I am getting married in a few months and I wonder what the change would be like when my fiancé moves in with me. Also hopefully I find her a friend by then.

I'm okay if she'll love me less, although that would be a bit sad!

Oh Ripshod told me yesterday she is a he but I'm so used to the female pronouns :roflmao:
 

Pat H

Jogging around the block
Joined
9/27/19
Messages
849
Location
Apple River, IL
Real Name
Pat
Every so often I see my old thread reappear. It's hard to believe I first wrote this in 2012, and my last post I think was around 2015 or 2016.

I figured I'll update everyone again on the continuing sage. ;)

Sweden my Goffin is becoming a stripper. Every year she takes off a little more. She's also trying to mate with every toy she has, and has been doing this for years.
In fact all my birds are hormonal monsters. Toddlers get free lessons in my house! My 5 year old Grandson asks some interesting questions.

Sweden is still her lovable, devilish self. Would be on me 24/7 if allowed. She can get her panties in a bunch once in a while, but I haven't seen much aggression from her at all. One nip this year.

Solomon is also humping everything in sight. If I even reach to pet him he squats and chitters. Gosh I wish these birds would calm down on the masturbation front!
No bites from Solomon. He's a sweetheart that loves company, but not snuggling.

Chaos is still a handful. One bad bite a month or so ago. I gave him a treat with the wrong hand.
He also is insanely hormonal. I watch TV to birdie moans.
Most of the time he is fine. He wanders the house, playing under any overhanging blanket he can find. Under my bed is his new hangout.
He'll join me on the couch for a bit, then it's off to do birdie things.
Then he gets in a mood. Usually I see it coming, but at times it's instant, and he's faster than me. At least his bites are quick and he doesn't hang on or grind.
I think they even surprise him when it happens. He's not being mean to me, but he's reacting to something I'm not aware of.

I want old OLD birds. :p Ones that aren't doing 'it' every moment of every day.
Oh well, I guess I'll just have to deal with my house of ill repute, for however long it lasts.

I keep hearing it does stop. Anyone know when?
Well, you're right! -- this thread is STILL GOING ! Though I've had birds for 40 years... I've NEVER thought about this issue! Very interesting perspectives... For the most part, I've turned my pets into breeders, except for my Senegal, now about 34 years old [the 1st big bird I raised]. The last two birds into this house were both rehomers/ rescues [our precious Timneh, Freddie, R.I.P.; and our Umbrella, Abby, now about 18yr old].
Very thought-provoking thread...
 

Crazy4parrots

Rollerblading along the road
Avenue Veteran
Celebirdy of the Month
Joined
2/17/13
Messages
4,184
Location
Parrotdise :) lol
Real Name
María
Update well Baylee is still her sweet self only that at 10 years old she is now more spoiled lol but her personality hasn’t changed at all.
 

macawpower58

Flying along the Avenue
Avenue Veteran
Celebirdy of the Month
Mayor of the Avenue
Avenue Spotlight Award
Shutterbugs' Best
Joined
8/25/11
Messages
9,621
Location
Pennsylvania
LOL Wish I could say the same! But, truthfully, mine are all doing well too. :)
 

Hipcricket

Meeting neighbors
Joined
3/4/21
Messages
62
Location
Cricketville ON
I've been pondering this for some time now. What will my hand reared babies think of me as they mature? Will I always own their hearts? What if not...:(

Now as my parrots are entering fully mature status I'm learning the answers to my questions. My Too is 17, my Zon is 13, and my GW is 12.

Two of them I got right before the weaning age, and did the weaning. My Macaw I fed from 5 weeks.

So far two of them are switching their affections. Solomon my amazon did so long ago, he loves my daughters, and accepts me. When my girls are home, I leave my feisty greenie alone!

Sweden my Goffin has begun looking for a love interest. I am not it. :( She also loves my daughters to death, and is even courting new folk these days. When alone her and I get along fine. But lately (last several years), she's taken to going on the attack if I dare to get between her and her new interests. In the last two days, I've gotten two bites. One on my neck (she flew at me), another on my hand as she pounced on me. My daughter moved back home this week, so these attacks are intensifying.

I'm glad she's not a U2 or M2. I can see how terrifying a large attacking Too would be. She does calm down, and I can handle her when she does so. But while she's in this intense state, I dare not approach her, or be sure to have a towel/blanket in hand if I do.

I think this stage will get worse before it gets better (if it even does).

Chaos is my youngest, and is also showing maturing behavior. He though has no one to switch his affections to, as he and my daughters have not so good relationships. He must deal with me, and only me. As it is, we now almost never snuggle, I am permitted head petting, but not much more. He keeps me at a distance. My knee is a good perch, but my arms are not to wrap around him.

I've grown with all of my birds, watched these changes slowly occur, and even sort of expected them. They still are not easy to accept. I am not hurt badly though, I've done so much research I've not been taken by surprise by their change in affections. And I still have their friendship most of the time, if not their undying devotion.

What I would do differently if I could.

I'd not buy a baby! I wanted companions to age with. I didn't want bird children to rear and have leave me! :p

How many uninformed owners though will have this happen and not know what hits them? How hard it must be to have your loved bird of 10 years suddenly start to attack you. I can see why so many birds of this age are up for adoption.

The dream of having a loving flock for life is slowly evaporating. I wonder how things will be in another 10 years. Will their attitude towards me turn to hate as their frustrations worsen? Will they calm down and accept their 'mom' is all they'll ever have?

Is rehoming a bird you've raised from a baby better for the bird? Will they be happier leaving the nest, and forming a new different relationship?

I wish I knew. :huh:

If anyone else is going through this, or has been through it and knows answers to my questions, I'd love to hear from you.
Has anyone else ever worried about this happening?

Life is ever changing. How do we help ourselves and our birds deal with it?
Wow! I’m SO impressed with the honesty on display here! As a person who is absolutely new to birds, had wanted one for years but always had dogs and cats in the house (now sadly departed) I am glad I did not go for the bird I wanted to - a parrolet! He or she was a hand reared baby still not fully feathered. I read and read and read. I found no honest disclosure on this scale. My gut told me that I should start with a simpler bird like a Budgie or lovebirds. But it would have helped me greatly to have found this site! Kudos to you all for looking at realities and not romanticizing the situation. I hope your birds come out the other side, bonds intact. But I feel they are fortunate to have people who are willing to look at things realistically and with their best interest in mind. Hugs from Toronto!
 
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