How do you keep your bird's loyalty?

[melissasparrots]

I've rarely had a bird choose another person over me. But I'm single so they don't have anyone else to pick from. I have had them choose another bird over me. IMO, its not something I really worry about. I just give the bird what it appears to need. If it seems satisfied with me for a companion, then I leave it at that. If they don't seem satisfied, then I offer them a mate. In most cases they accept the mate, if not then I try either a different mate or see if someone else in my family can get a relationship going with the bird which might indicate it just doesn't like me. I have a parrotlet living with my parents because while I hand-raised it, I also had to fix a broken leg it had as a baby and the bird has never liked me and other birds pick on him, so he was happier with someone else.

Generally, my advise would be not to get too hung up on if your bird will like you forever and ever. They have their own preferences and you can't really control it much. Just as you can't walk into a bar and control if a certain hot guy/gal likes you. If that is a real concern, get a dog. They love everyone.

My advice would be to go into bird ownership with the idea of keeping your bird happy, and be less concerned about your own emotional needs for commitment from another species. You have the potential to bond with a human or other pet if the bird thinks you are second best. Just let it have a happy life with you, even if you are second, third or fourth place.

Bird preferences do tend to depend on the gender of the bird and the species though. An amazon for example will tend to actively reject someone that comes at them morning noon and night trying to cuddle them all the time. A cockatoo might think that is just totally awesome but some male birds might be inclined to push around a weak and overly cuddly/dependent human female to the point that he ruins his own best relationship just because he can. Birds are tricky. Just read his body language. Don't let him make you his door mat but offer pets and cuddles and be willing to take no for an answer. I find that tends to work for most species. Sometimes the more you chase after them all the time trying to make sure they like you, the more creeped out they get and start looking for someone else to be their favorite. Play it cool, but make sure they know you are available basically.

 

[DQTimnehs]

Your birds all sound very cute and sweet I think that some birds prefer guys because of less hair all over, I think it annoys em haha. A U2 I know will groom women's hair back out of the way if it's down.

How old are all of your birds? Aka, are they mature? And all African Grays? I think that the particular species sometimes, not always, has to do with how strongly they bond and how friendly/one-person they are. I've also heard of Grays being more independent in general. On the flip side, do you pick favorites?

My birds are all adults:
Darwin, TAG, male, 18 yrs;
Quack, TAG, female, 16 yrs;
Tiki, BHP, female, ~15 yrs;
Itsy, Meyer's, female, 10 yrs.

I love them all and they are all very different.
Darwin loves attention but is also very active playing on his own. If he gets bored though, he bothers Quack by flying at her and often drives her off her play stand.

Itsy is happy to sit on my bf's shoulder but likes when I take her to work on her pin feathers. She will peep hormonally for me and sometimes for him.

Tiki is independant for a while then waddles over to me to pick her up. She likes to sit on my chest or shoulder and get snuggles.

Quack is nervous (even moreso with Darwin and sometimes Itsy going after her) but loves attention, just not a lot of hands on. She loves to dance and whistle. Most days I ask her if she wants to swing and she steps up to be swung upside down. She really loves this! If I don't start swinging soon enough, she swings herself hanging upside down from my hand. And she loves an audience (at least 2 people) to do crazy bird in her cage at bedtime while we cheer her on.
Last night she jumped on my back as I bent over but doesn't know what to do once she's there. I picked her up with a perch and she was blushing pink. I think she wants what the other birds have (being on shoulders) but she doesn't know how to act and can't really be trusted that close to my face. Maybe some day we will get there.

I can't pick a favourite as they all have something special about them.

 

[cassiesdad]

@DQTimnehs ...I think I've said it before, but I'll say it again...you've got quite a flock there...

 

[ode.to.parrots]

What about you, why do you think your birds have a preference for you or fiancée?

Honestly, I am not sure. Haha. I've always been their primary caretaker. I think that fact, plus some fun with training (which also, by the way, allows for better communication between me and my birds), has allowed me to develop a positive relationship with my birds, ESPECIALLY the ever stubborn Mr. Buckbeak. I think if the tables were turned and my fiance were the primary caretaker and I were just there, Buckbeak probably wouldn't even acknowledge me. Or maybe he would?
That's the thing - my fiance didn't do anything specific to gain Buckbeak's love. In fact, his first impression of these birds was that they were annoying (gasp!). But Buckbeak picked HIM. It was Buckbeak's obvious and immediate love for my fiance that first convinced my fiance to see these birds in a different way. My fiance is, simply, Buckbeak's favorite person.
There are times were I do think it is just part of Buckbeak's personality. He loves impressing people and getting people's attention, although he is VERY wary of being handled. At first I thought he just had a preference for men, since he will serenade and fly after my brothers and my dad when they are around (one of my brother's is fond of the birds and will acknowledge them and talk to them and handle them, but my other brother avoids the birds whenever possible, and Buckbeak still wants to offer him love and attention!). However, I have also seen Buckbeak display this same attention grabbing behavior with my mom, so I no longer think it is a gender preference.
I will also say that, as of this past weekend, Buckbeak has started offering me more attention even with my fiance around, and I think I have training to thank for that. Yesterday he happily perched on me knee (which, granted, was next to his favorite human (my fiance) but still). He even got antsy when I left the room for a bit (the flattens down spreads his wings like he is ready to leap at your face) and then, when I got back, decided to hop/fly off of my fiance's shoulder and onto my hand as opposed to stepping up. So even though I am not his "chosen" one, it is clear that we are ever developing a bond with each other.

Indy is more straight forward. So long as he isn't in a sleepy/grumpy mood, he likes everyone. Even at the vet's office he flew up and landed on the vet's shoulder. Offer him cashews, and he'll be your new best friend. I just happen to offer him the most cashews and the most head scratches, and he knows that! Haha.

I have no idea if that was what you were looking for, but I hope it helps!