Biscuitpaw
Meeting neighbors
- Joined
- 6/2/20
- Messages
- 36
Hi, I was hoping you guys could help me out with some advice on how to deal with some behavioral issues I've been having with my cockatiel..? I love him very much, but I'm at my wit's end..
His name is Tango and he's about 2 and a half years old. My husband and I adopted him from a family who sadly didn't have the time for him. We've had him since the beginning of the year, about mid-January. We adopted him to help me with my mental health, and unfortunately he's been more detrimental to it recently..
I've had cockatiels before, but only females, so Tango is a bit of a new experience to me. He came to us with a reflection obsession that I was only informed of when we came to pick him up. I figured it wouldn't be too difficult to manage, since all we had to do was keep him away from reflective surfaces. Unfortunately, it proved to be a bigger problem than we had anticipated. His previous owners had his wings clipped because he would find his reflection somewhere and would swoop and attack anyone who came close. We've kept his wings clipped and done our best to keep him away from reflective surfaces, but as soon as we think we're good, he'll find his reflection somewhere new, where we would never had expected it, such as the water in his bowl (we then got him a smaller bowl), the metal washers holding up his perches (we now only use rope perches with plastic), and even his own shadow. He then becomes incredibly protective of his "mate" and will bite to the point of drawing blood. In those situations I always end up removing him from where he is (using a towel to pick him up) and/or remove whatever's got his attention. Unfortunately, I can't always remove it (we rent our home and the closet doors are mirrors, etc.) but this ties into his other issue.
I want to mention at this point that we've got him on a day/night cycle that ensures he gets at least 14 hours of sleep a night and have been since we got him.
Since my husband worked all day (pre-pandemic), I would spend all my time with Tango. He and I would hang out in the living room all day, him either on his makeshift portable bird gym, or walking around on the floor, mostly under the glass coffee table. He bonded to me, although not like a mate, he hasn't tried to "woo" me, and for a while it was nice, he likes his kisses and head scritches and would sit on my shoulder whenever he could. Unfortunately he became TOO attatched.. he developed seperation anxiety and would start flock calling and singing frantically whenever I would leave the room or wasn't within eyesight. It wasn't a big deal up until my husband had to start working from home. I started getting self conscious about the noise because my husband was getting frustrated. At first I tried ignoring Tango's until he's quiet for a little bit, a few seconds maybe. I thought maybe he would then associate that screaming doesn't work. But that a bad take on my part and I ended up feeling trapped in the room with him because I knew he would start screaming if I left, and if I did leave, I wouldn't be able to return until he stopped.. eventually. And I would have to rush back in before he started up again a few moments later. And if I forgot my phone or something in the room, too bad. Eventually I decided to think of a new flock call for him to use for me, a short, generic whistle that was MUCH quieter than the default cockatiel flock call. It was working with mixed results. He started picking up on it, but whenever I would call back to him, he would get LOUDER, more frantic, more desperate, essentially prolonging the screaming fit. I was frustrated, my husband was frustrated.
I figured being around us for too long made him too dependent on us, so in a last-ditch effort to teach Tango to be more independent (as well as kind of a mental break for me), I set up his cage by the window in the pet room (opened w/ a screen) during the day so he can enjoy the breeze and look outside. Although he still complains when I leave, I make sure to call back to him when he uses the whistle I taught him. He's quiet more often now and calms down quicker. However.. I did feel bad that he essentially was caged up all day, even with toys and the window, (aside from my visits when he was quiet). So I opened his cage door to let him get a better view and feel more free. He liked that a LOT.. until he realized he could jump onto the windowsill and scooted over to where the window was closed (it slides open to the side. His cage was placed in front of the open side). He saw himself in the glass, and became aggressive/protective of the entire window. So now, cage open or not, I can't leave him by the window or he will try to bite me, which he has. I had to move him away from the window..
I've also realized why he loved to hang out underneath the glass table in the living room.. if anything is on the table (such as a table mat), he can see his reflection from underneath because it turns the glass into a reflective surface due to the darkness. So now he can't walk around on the floor until we get an entirely new set of living room furniture (all tables are glass and we thought it would be ok if we just didn't let him hang out on top of it or had a towel on it).
Anyways, back to the cage.. I hear him flirting from time to time, (he has a specific tune he does while doing heart-wings and side stepping), but since I can't enter the room when he's doing that (it'll teach him that the song will make me appear to check it out), I can't tell when he's singing to. Is it a toy..? The window..? (He's not by it anymore but he can still see the window) A perch..? His food/water bowl..? I do hear him put his head into one of the bowls when singing (changes the sound). How am I supposed to determine what he's singing to so I can take it away..?? And if it's the window, I can't remove the window, nor do we have any blinds. We don't have another room that we could put him in, but something is making him suddenly territorially aggressive and I can't figure out what. He was okay before the window incident (yesterday), so that's why I suspect the window.
He's also become wary of hands because now he associates them with being put back into the cage, but I'm working on that with treats like I used to when he first arrived. I have a pouch of spray millet taped by the door of the pet room so we can come in and reward him with whenever he is quiet and tempt him to step up with it. Hopefully it gets better..?
I've gotten really disheartened and depressed the past couple of days because of all this because it feels like I can't give Tango any freedom. No matter how well I try to bird proof an area, he finds himself/his reflection somewhere. But I know he needs mental stimulation. I'm looking into forage toys but they seem to be marketed towards larger birds and are too big. But I also have to make sure that it's not made from metal or shiny plastic, or has ANY tiny pieces (washers, screws, chains, bells) that are made from them because then he WILL see his reflection, however vaguely.
I also just want to note that the "cage treatment" has only been going on for the past 3 days. I found that Tango had made a lot more progress with us whistling back and forth to eachother from his cage than when he was on his bird gym with my husband and I.
I know it's far from ideal to make his cage his main area though.. cockatiels need social time, but I was just worried maybe he had too much and got needy..? I feel very conflicted.. progress aside, is this the right thing to do..? I feel better this way because I can freely move about the house, and Tango gets assured that I'm still home/close by with the flock calls, (and, like I've mentioned, he's made better progress this way) but I still feel guilty..? Am I a bad owner..? Or am I doing the right thing..?
His name is Tango and he's about 2 and a half years old. My husband and I adopted him from a family who sadly didn't have the time for him. We've had him since the beginning of the year, about mid-January. We adopted him to help me with my mental health, and unfortunately he's been more detrimental to it recently..
I've had cockatiels before, but only females, so Tango is a bit of a new experience to me. He came to us with a reflection obsession that I was only informed of when we came to pick him up. I figured it wouldn't be too difficult to manage, since all we had to do was keep him away from reflective surfaces. Unfortunately, it proved to be a bigger problem than we had anticipated. His previous owners had his wings clipped because he would find his reflection somewhere and would swoop and attack anyone who came close. We've kept his wings clipped and done our best to keep him away from reflective surfaces, but as soon as we think we're good, he'll find his reflection somewhere new, where we would never had expected it, such as the water in his bowl (we then got him a smaller bowl), the metal washers holding up his perches (we now only use rope perches with plastic), and even his own shadow. He then becomes incredibly protective of his "mate" and will bite to the point of drawing blood. In those situations I always end up removing him from where he is (using a towel to pick him up) and/or remove whatever's got his attention. Unfortunately, I can't always remove it (we rent our home and the closet doors are mirrors, etc.) but this ties into his other issue.
I want to mention at this point that we've got him on a day/night cycle that ensures he gets at least 14 hours of sleep a night and have been since we got him.
Since my husband worked all day (pre-pandemic), I would spend all my time with Tango. He and I would hang out in the living room all day, him either on his makeshift portable bird gym, or walking around on the floor, mostly under the glass coffee table. He bonded to me, although not like a mate, he hasn't tried to "woo" me, and for a while it was nice, he likes his kisses and head scritches and would sit on my shoulder whenever he could. Unfortunately he became TOO attatched.. he developed seperation anxiety and would start flock calling and singing frantically whenever I would leave the room or wasn't within eyesight. It wasn't a big deal up until my husband had to start working from home. I started getting self conscious about the noise because my husband was getting frustrated. At first I tried ignoring Tango's until he's quiet for a little bit, a few seconds maybe. I thought maybe he would then associate that screaming doesn't work. But that a bad take on my part and I ended up feeling trapped in the room with him because I knew he would start screaming if I left, and if I did leave, I wouldn't be able to return until he stopped.. eventually. And I would have to rush back in before he started up again a few moments later. And if I forgot my phone or something in the room, too bad. Eventually I decided to think of a new flock call for him to use for me, a short, generic whistle that was MUCH quieter than the default cockatiel flock call. It was working with mixed results. He started picking up on it, but whenever I would call back to him, he would get LOUDER, more frantic, more desperate, essentially prolonging the screaming fit. I was frustrated, my husband was frustrated.
I figured being around us for too long made him too dependent on us, so in a last-ditch effort to teach Tango to be more independent (as well as kind of a mental break for me), I set up his cage by the window in the pet room (opened w/ a screen) during the day so he can enjoy the breeze and look outside. Although he still complains when I leave, I make sure to call back to him when he uses the whistle I taught him. He's quiet more often now and calms down quicker. However.. I did feel bad that he essentially was caged up all day, even with toys and the window, (aside from my visits when he was quiet). So I opened his cage door to let him get a better view and feel more free. He liked that a LOT.. until he realized he could jump onto the windowsill and scooted over to where the window was closed (it slides open to the side. His cage was placed in front of the open side). He saw himself in the glass, and became aggressive/protective of the entire window. So now, cage open or not, I can't leave him by the window or he will try to bite me, which he has. I had to move him away from the window..
I've also realized why he loved to hang out underneath the glass table in the living room.. if anything is on the table (such as a table mat), he can see his reflection from underneath because it turns the glass into a reflective surface due to the darkness. So now he can't walk around on the floor until we get an entirely new set of living room furniture (all tables are glass and we thought it would be ok if we just didn't let him hang out on top of it or had a towel on it).
Anyways, back to the cage.. I hear him flirting from time to time, (he has a specific tune he does while doing heart-wings and side stepping), but since I can't enter the room when he's doing that (it'll teach him that the song will make me appear to check it out), I can't tell when he's singing to. Is it a toy..? The window..? (He's not by it anymore but he can still see the window) A perch..? His food/water bowl..? I do hear him put his head into one of the bowls when singing (changes the sound). How am I supposed to determine what he's singing to so I can take it away..?? And if it's the window, I can't remove the window, nor do we have any blinds. We don't have another room that we could put him in, but something is making him suddenly territorially aggressive and I can't figure out what. He was okay before the window incident (yesterday), so that's why I suspect the window.
He's also become wary of hands because now he associates them with being put back into the cage, but I'm working on that with treats like I used to when he first arrived. I have a pouch of spray millet taped by the door of the pet room so we can come in and reward him with whenever he is quiet and tempt him to step up with it. Hopefully it gets better..?
I've gotten really disheartened and depressed the past couple of days because of all this because it feels like I can't give Tango any freedom. No matter how well I try to bird proof an area, he finds himself/his reflection somewhere. But I know he needs mental stimulation. I'm looking into forage toys but they seem to be marketed towards larger birds and are too big. But I also have to make sure that it's not made from metal or shiny plastic, or has ANY tiny pieces (washers, screws, chains, bells) that are made from them because then he WILL see his reflection, however vaguely.
I also just want to note that the "cage treatment" has only been going on for the past 3 days. I found that Tango had made a lot more progress with us whistling back and forth to eachother from his cage than when he was on his bird gym with my husband and I.
I know it's far from ideal to make his cage his main area though.. cockatiels need social time, but I was just worried maybe he had too much and got needy..? I feel very conflicted.. progress aside, is this the right thing to do..? I feel better this way because I can freely move about the house, and Tango gets assured that I'm still home/close by with the flock calls, (and, like I've mentioned, he's made better progress this way) but I still feel guilty..? Am I a bad owner..? Or am I doing the right thing..?
