Overbonding??? HELP!

[TheBeesKnees]

So....I knew this would happen, but now that it is happening, I am worried about what to do to stop it. Sozzie is completely, 100%, obsessed with me...I know. I know. I promised myself I wouldn't let it happen, but it has and now I feel like I don't know where to turn or what to do. I am completely sucked in.

We are in the process of moving right now, so it's Sozzie's first big move too....he's actually doing really well. Loved the car ride, loved helping me unpack things etc. He's eating and drinking just fine. BUT, if I leave the room for one second, he's literally breaking his neck to do anything he can to get to me.

If someone else is holding him, he wants nothing to do with them, and he'll do whatever necessary to get back to me.

In the morning when we wake up, he does "calls" to me to see where I am at, and if I don't answer he freaks out trying to find me.

So, I am turning to you my AA experts....what can I do? He has lots of toys, great diet, lots of things to keep his mind entertained....we're all sweet to him, he's rEAlly spoiled??? .... so what can I possibly do to turn this around?

 

[Greycloud]

Lindsey, has the behavior started in your new home? If so it might just be a security issue.

 

[Deejo]

I'm certainly not an expert, but have had some experience with this.
How long ago was your move?

When Coco arrived in September, she also screamed if I was out of her sight. That was normal...new house, new people, she was a little frightened at first.
Do not go running back to Sozzie! That's a common mistake, and sets a pattern that will be extremely difficult to break later on.
Just use a calm voice from wherever you are, and tell Sozzie you'll be right back.

With Coco, it only took a few times of letting her know I was close by, and she has never screamed since.
I suspect your macaw is adjusting to the new surroundings.

On a side note...this is an example of why the best advice for anyone with a new bird, is that they interact with the bird in a way they can easily maintain for years to come. So if we are constantly playing with, cuddling, holding the parrot, we have to be prepared to continue that indefinately, or deal with the various issues if we stop. A good balance from the first weeks/months with a new parrot, are key to a good relationship.

 

[SandraK]

Wish I could help you but you know I don't have a macaw. It does sound, however, as if you've got a mommy bird on your hands. One of my tiels, Indie, is a mommy bird and will follow me wherever she can. I have found though, that when she calls from another room and I call her back or whistle to her, she seems to understand that I'm in the house just not in the same room with her.

Keep in mind too that though Sozzie has taken the move in stride he's definitely aware that he's in a new place and that might be adding to his insecurity about not seeing you in the same room in this "new" place. I may be wrong, but if you leave a room and he calls for you try calling back to him and telling him its okay. It might reduce the urge to follow you if he knows that you are still in the new place with him, just not visible.As for moving, I can sympathize with you - we just moved over Memorial Day weekend and are still going through boxes (which lived in the garage in the old house). We moved the fids at the very end of the move so that when they went into the new house there was furniture and things they recognized around them.

 

[crzybrdldy]

Now would probably be a good time for the entire family to work on target training with Sozzie, have his absolute favorite treat to use; small bits of papaya, mango or even small bits of walnut, and only use that as the training treat. You can find something else that doesn't have the same value to give as a treat for what I call an anytime treat. Everyone should be consistant when doing this. I would recommend getting Barbara Heidenreichs training dvd's that way there will be no mistake on how all will proceed.

Best of luck!

 

[JLcribber]

The first thing you need to setup in the new place is "his" area. The move is an opportunity to change certain things just because it's a new environment. If you start out right away with the way you want things, the sooner things become normal for him.

A cage in his own room would be great and "slowly" out into his own room. No matter what you do it's still brand new to "him". He'll adapt to the new place just like you will.

You have a chance to teach independence if you stick to your guns and make him entertain himself with the door closed. It doesn't have to be 8 hours a day. Start slow but out of sight/sound for some period of time.

 

[TheBeesKnees]

Yes and no. The recent REALLY clingy-ness, yes.

 

[TheBeesKnees]

Ok, thank you guys SO very much.

I think I am actually doing the best things then....

We aren't responding everytime he flies around. I give it a few minutes to make sure he isn't in trouble, then we move him back.

As for the new home. We moved everything into its' place before bringing him, so he would adjust accordingly, and he has so far.

I do believe we need to start target training with him and I just ordered the DVD you suggested, so I am thinking that'll help too!!

to all of you guys, I really appreciate it. I just do not want to get into any "habits" you know???

-L

 

[Zombie]

You really do need to nip this in the bud. I made the same mistake with my first bird (Harley, a Cockatiel) and he wound up plucking when I temporarily moved away. I'm not saying it will happen to Sozzie, I'm just sharing my experience with you. Aside from the advice already given, this is what I did to help settle Harley and make him less clingy:

- I very gradually decreased our time together over a period of a few months, just by 5 minutes here and there at first.

- I taught him to play with puzzles, gave him foraging feeders and showed him how to use them, and encouraged him to play with toys.

- I got him a Cockatiel friend (I'm not suggesting you get a new Macaw, maybe just leave the radio on when you're not around and put the cage near a window he can see wild birds or trees).

- I used a rescue remedy plug-in at the start, to help calm him down.

Fortunately, Harley was always very sociable and enjoyed being with other people. My suggestion is to have other people offer Sozzie treats through the bars of the cage. If he won't take it, try stepping out of the room and see if he will take it then. Once he has started to show some improvement when it comes to not freaking out when you leave, try taking him out of the cage and putting him on a perch or t-stand in a room with a friend or family member. Leave the room so he can't come to you, and have them offer him food.
Once he starts to accept food from other people, the battle is half won. Just keep exposing him to different friends and family who must always have his favourite snacks on hand, and he'll begin to associate guests with lovely treats. My Nanday, Inca, always liked meeting new people but would always fly back to me after a few moments. After training him in the above way, he now will fly to whoever has food, and if multiple people have food he will fly to whoever has the tastiest food.

I hope this helps. There might be better ways out there, but these are methods I have used myself successfully.