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Are we bonded?

Chandler

Strolling the yard
Joined
12/4/15
Messages
90
We rescued a 16 YO African Grey named Budweiser about 5 months ago. My dad is technically the owner as I work and live about an hour away but come to visit on the weekends. He rescued Bud with the intent to pass him on to me in the future, seeing as how they can live to be 60+. Right now it is best he live with my dad though as he works from home and has the time and resources and I am at the busiest time in my life so switching homes isn't an option at this point.

The first four months of his transitional period he wouldn't let anyone touch him and wouldn't leave the top or area around his cage but he was eating well, not plucking, and being vocal. Two months ago he began allowing me (and only me) to walk up to his cage and scratch his nape. I received a few little warning bites because it was hard for me to decipher when he wanted one or when he wanted to be left alone (thank goodness I've got that figured out now). Anyways, the last two months he has been a completely different bird! He walks around the house freely (he is not clipped, just seems to prefer to walk) and follows me into any room I go. He will now step up on me and walk up to my shoulder and sit there for HOURS nuzzling into my neck, letting me scratch his head endlessly, and cooing in my ear.

I give you this background info because he seems to just "tolerate" my father, who is the one that feeds him, sits with him all day, cleans his cage, etc. It is very frustrating for my dad to watch how cuddly and sweet he is with me but he barely gives him the time of day. He has stepped up on my dad ONCE and as soon as he felt just a tiny bit unsteady he took a good sized chunk out of his hand. When I leave for the week apparently he will walk up to my bedroom door and knock on it with his head as if waiting for me to come out. I know that greys can sometimes be one-person birds so I guess this post comes with two questions: 1) does it seem like Bud has already chosen me as his "person"? and 2) am I doing any damage by leaving him for 5 days at a time?

(note: my dad said Bud doesn't seem to be depressed or distressed when I am not there, he doesn't pluck, stays vocal, eats normally, etc. he just seems to walk around looking for me and hanging around my room. Also, he had only been in one previous home for his first 16 years and they did tell us that he prefers women but he seemed to still have a decent relationship with the man in that house)
 

sunnysmom

Joyriding the Neighborhood
Avenue Veteran
Celebirdy of the Month
Mayor of the Avenue
Avenue Spotlight Award
Joined
9/16/13
Messages
21,829
Location
Pennsylvania
Real Name
Michelle
Welcome to the forum. I don't have Grey experience but to me, it sounds like he has chosen you as his person. That doesn't mean that he doesn't like your dad. Your dad is part of the "flock" but birds tend to pick their people. Your description actually sounds a lot like what happened with my tiel- who came to live with us when he was 15. At first, he didn't want to be away from his cage etc., then after a few months he completely transformed and loves to explore, etc. "My" tiel is technically my fiancé's tiel- he was left to him in a will. But I am by far my tiel's favorite person. And at first my fiancé did get frustrated at how affectionate Sunny was with me and not so much with him. Now, he just accepts that that's his relationship with Sunny. Sunny likes him- looks for him when he's not there, is happy to spend time with him when I'm not home, but when I am home, Sunny is all about his momma. :)

@Greycloud ? @vmashley03 ?
 

Chandler

Strolling the yard
Joined
12/4/15
Messages
90
Thank you for the reassurance! Your Sunny is beautiful by the way!

I am glad that he likes me since eventually he will have to live with me full time and it is good to know it won't be a problem. We also rescued a double yellow headed amazon a few weeks ago named Poppy (she is 13) and she has already bonded with my dad but pays me no attention so I think that evens things out :lol:
 

Fatgirl

Sprinting down the street
Joined
9/19/15
Messages
549
We rescued a 16 YO African Grey named Budweiser about 5 months ago. My dad is technically the owner as I work and live about an hour away but come to visit on the weekends. He rescued Bud with the intent to pass him on to me in the future, seeing as how they can live to be 60+. Right now it is best he live with my dad though as he works from home and has the time and resources and I am at the busiest time in my life so switching homes isn't an option at this point.

The first four months of his transitional period he wouldn't let anyone touch him and wouldn't leave the top or area around his cage but he was eating well, not plucking, and being vocal. Two months ago he began allowing me (and only me) to walk up to his cage and scratch his nape. I received a few little warning bites because it was hard for me to decipher when he wanted one or when he wanted to be left alone (thank goodness I've got that figured out now). Anyways, the last two months he has been a completely different bird! He walks around the house freely (he is not clipped, just seems to prefer to walk) and follows me into any room I go. He will now step up on me and walk up to my shoulder and sit there for HOURS nuzzling into my neck, letting me scratch his head endlessly, and cooing in my ear.

I give you this background info because he seems to just "tolerate" my father, who is the one that feeds him, sits with him all day, cleans his cage, etc. It is very frustrating for my dad to watch how cuddly and sweet he is with me but he barely gives him the time of day. He has stepped up on my dad ONCE and as soon as he felt just a tiny bit unsteady he took a good sized chunk out of his hand. When I leave for the week apparently he will walk up to my bedroom door and knock on it with his head as if waiting for me to come out. I know that greys can sometimes be one-person birds so I guess this post comes with two questions: 1) does it seem like Bud has already chosen me as his "person"? and 2) am I doing any damage by leaving him for 5 days at a time?

(note: my dad said Bud doesn't seem to be depressed or distressed when I am not there, he doesn't pluck, stays vocal, eats normally, etc. he just seems to walk around looking for me and hanging around my room. Also, he had only been in one previous home for his first 16 years and they did tell us that he prefers women but he seemed to still have a decent relationship with the man in that house)

Your Bud sounds a lot like my Bobo! Even my Bobo only prefers my brother the most and will let him do anything he wants with him. Everyone else he is different with even though we spend everyday with him.
 

Chandler

Strolling the yard
Joined
12/4/15
Messages
90
Your Bud sounds a lot like my Bobo! Even my Bobo only prefers my brother the most and will let him do anything he wants with him. Everyone else he is different with even though we spend everyday with him.
They are so weird that way! I am going there today for the weekend and am excited to see how he reacts and what new things he will let me do with him. Although this is what he did to me dad a few days ago so I hope I don't catch him in a bratty mood haha
3534e985-8a9d-4a0a-9615-ddd53dd51481.jpg 4badec79-612a-4f99-bc42-f2e9ba1618e0.jpg
 

sunnysmom

Joyriding the Neighborhood
Avenue Veteran
Celebirdy of the Month
Mayor of the Avenue
Avenue Spotlight Award
Joined
9/16/13
Messages
21,829
Location
Pennsylvania
Real Name
Michelle
Thank you for the reassurance! Your Sunny is beautiful by the way!
Thanks!

And sorry to see that your dad got bit. It happens though.....
 

Sweet Louise

Rollerblading along the road
Joined
9/29/15
Messages
1,444
Real Name
Pat
handsome bird! cool that your dad is sticking in there even after the bites. What kind of birds has your family owned in the past/present?
 

Chandler

Strolling the yard
Joined
12/4/15
Messages
90
My dad owned a macaw and tiels growing up but Bud (and now our DYH) are my first experience with any kind of bird. This is why I am happy to learn from my dad and absorb as much knowledge as I can before I inevitably have to take them on myself. I visited Bud this past weekend and he is just as sweet to me as ever but unfortunately gave my dad another good bite! Silly bird.
 
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