Im so sorry you not only lost a bird you lost a family member a very close family member , healing takes time , this was your child , greave and dont hide it , let it out , Its a shock to your system not just your heart , he was 1/3 of your being and greaving takes time but he will always be with you till your time comes beleave it , its only his body gone he lives in you
I realy feel your pain but dont close doors , nothing will ever take his plkace remember that but im sure in time you will find another AMAZON that needs you as well as you needing it .
your still young and a long life ahead of you to raise another child or older child,,lol life works in strange ways its a steping stone with many paths
so glad you came to AA and alowing us to share in your greef, and when evere your read please post pics let us help you heal
think of the good times it will help
healing prayers comming your way
husssssssss