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Will she remember me?

Vlad.Aras

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Vlad.A
So a couple of years ago I got a female cocktail. She was a fussy girl and did not like me at first,(she didn’t like anyone) but after spending hours with her and dedication, she opened up and we became the best friends. And I mean best friends, we had a very deep bond and she would recognize my voice from the rest of the family (some 11 people) and would even “protect” me from other people. Well anyways a couple months ago, due to my brother’s recently developed allergies toward birds, we had to give her away to my uncle. I hear that she lives a fabulous life there and I often wonder if she would still remember. If I randomly showed up, would she be happy to see me and ready to abandon her new home, to return to me? It would break my heart if I eventually did visit her and found her hissing and gapping at me like she normally does to unfamiliar faces. BD591651-E685-4C80-9853-B0A641109645.jpeg D5F9F2CF-0CD0-4A5D-A221-94B7497E1DC7.jpeg 19170A1A-FFC0-49F5-BACE-FC373EAD8F89.jpeg 3BE48994-AD88-4505-8A80-5C06B3093755.jpeg 7714DA1D-B7D1-454D-B9C5-937C2C717CAF.jpeg BCBD928A-774D-46F7-9EEA-40C2749F6580.jpeg
 

faislaq

I have macaws and don't post enough pictures
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I think it is very likely that she remembers you, but it could be upsetting for her to see you for a short while and then lose you again.

Would it be possible for you to visit on a regular and frequent basis? :) Perhaps for a few hours a couple of times a week?
 

scrape

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I would say she will remember you, but will take a couple minutes to warm back up. Once over the initial meeting, I am sure she will be thrilled to see you. They have good memory.
 

Feathery

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Birds have amazing memory and facial recognition. Many years ago, there was an experient done with crows that were trapped by a person wearing a caveman mask. The crows still reacted fearful years later when they saw someone wearing the same mask, but had no fear response to a different mask (Dick Cheney).

What's interesting is that 5 years after the experiment, an increased number of crows had the same reaction including those that weren't trapped. This not only shows facial recognition but also learning from social cues.

 

Vlad.Aras

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Vlad.A
I think it is very likely that she remembers you, but it could be upsetting for her to see you for a short while and then lose you again.

Would it be possible for you to visit on a regular and frequent basis? :) Perhaps for a few hours a couple of times a week?
Thanks for the clarification.Unfortunately my uncle lives up in Pennsylvania while I’m located down in the little state of South Carolina, so frequent visits are not very possible. But I will be going up there this summer, so I really am hoping for a pleasant reunion.
 

QB1rd

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Thanks for the clarification.Unfortunately my uncle lives up in Pennsylvania while I’m located down in the little state of South Carolina, so frequent visits are not very possible. But I will be going up there this summer, so I really am hoping for a pleasant reunion.
I hope it goes well for you!
 

Tiel Feathers

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She will definitely remember you! One of my birds just adores my daughter, who went away for school. When she comes back to visit three times a year, my bird is always very excited and happy to see her.
 

tka

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Something to think about is whether the reunion would be for you or for her.

For you, it's lovely to see her again, you're delighted that she's doing well and you're thrilled that she remembers you and is affectionate towards you. You then leave, full of happiness that you got to see your beloved bird again.

For her, it's confusing. It may have been difficult for her to move to a new home and lose that relationship with you. She had to form social bonds with new people and develop a new set of relationships. She might well be thrilled to see you again - but then you're gone again. She doesn't know when you'll come back. She doesn't know whether you'll ever come back. It might disrupt her relationships in her new home, and can lead to anxiety and associated behaviours like screaming and feather picking. Remember, we can't tell our birds "hi, I'm just here for a visit. You're not coming home with me, and it might be a very very long time before I see you again".

If visits can be something more regular, then sure. My wife studies in the US so is out of the country for months at a time and when she comes back, Leia does remember her. Leia has got used to one person in her life going away for a few months and coming back again. However, the main person in Leia's life is me. If I ever had to rehome her, I don't think it would be fair on her to visit her. Much as I love her, I wouldn't want to cause her the distress of suddenly appearing, enjoying her delight at my presence, then leaving again for an unknown amount of time - maybe years. It would be a terribly hard decision but I would have to prioritise her over my own feelings.

So here's my question: who does a reunion benefit?
 
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FeatheredM

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That's great you get to see your bird again. It must be very exciting. Just a tip: make sure not to stress. It won't be good for you or your bird.
 
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