Suddenly Hates me!!

[n’s tiel]

I got my Tiel about 2 months ago from a petshop (no breeders around me) and they told me he's about 12 weeks old. We made slow progress but he eventually would sit on my hand and eat his seed when I put it next to a perch but was more hesitant to perch on a finger.

I've let him free a handful of times and he flies a bit but usually is quite content to just sit on top of his cage. He escaped the first time and I had to towel him back in but he didn't seem too shaken by it, he was eating out of my hand again etc and I've let him out more times and got him back by waiting for him to land on a perch and putting that into the cage.

Recently he is started nipping me and hissing at me more and more and if I let him out he refuses to go back in, he flies around and tires himself out eventually just hisses at me profusely. He is much more wary around my hands and bites me often. It's as if he doesn't trust me anymore! I don't want him to have to stay in his cage all the time, I want to be able to handle him and give him affection but I don't want him to be distressed. I'm a first time bird owner so I need advice as I really don't want to do the wrong thing.

I'm considering starting training again from square one but I'm frightened that he hates me now! Any advice?

 

[Khizz]

It does sound like something you did might have unintentionally spooked him. Unless you can think of something else, I would say maybe the towelling, did you only towel him once?

It sounds like starting from step 1 is a good idea. See what he's comfortable with and go from there. He doesn't hate you, and you can start again, tiels don't hold grudges Many people say that tiels are actually very forgiving!

 

[Mtyler87]

I agree, it sounds good to start from step 1 again.
When I first had my aggressive cockatiel, I'd sit besides his cage for an hour a day and not pay attention to him so he'd see that I'm not a threat and get used to being close.

Perhaps keeping him in his cage for a while will be beneficial, just to avoid the stress for him flying away in a panic.

Based on my feral bird, I do believe any cockatiel can open up and gain trust given time and careful management.

 

[JaneLane]

Are you sure he is not a she? While some people do not like drawing a distinction between the cockatiel sexes, in my experience there is one but not a bad one per say. Female cockatiels are hissy and are more likely to put their mouths on your as a warning without actually biting to hurt you, they are generally pacifists. They like to bluff. Frost bluffs often but she is sweet and cuddly as can be and has never actually bitten me but if she gets in a mood she will hiss at me for changing her food bowl...
Could you post a picture of her so we can see?
Frost has been hissing since I got her, I have learned she means nothing by it. Sometimes I will try to rub her head and she will "huff" and put her mouth on me, then happily allow me to pet her. She also throws hissing, grumbling tantrums when it is time for her to go back into her cage, Zephaniah does not he simply says something that sounds like "Mm-Oh!" and runs away to avoid capture. He says "oh, oh oh!" sometimes when something happens that bothers him (like the budgie breaking into his cage) but he does not hiss unless he is genuinely scared or angry.

Also if you got him from a pet store it is quite possible he is older and needs a little more tlc, I was considering getting my first cockatiel from a chain pet store, perhaps the same one you got yours from, before I got Frost, but all the shopkeepers told me that I would have to be careful, they are skittish. Which is totally normal as these birds are not used to human interaction so you must teach him humans are nice.
It is also possible that towel incident frightened him and he is scared of you doing it again. In that case it will take time but he will come around. Im sure it will work out for you and him

 

[Lady Jane]

He escaped the first time and I had to towel him back in but he didn't seem too shaken by it, he was eating out of my hand again etc and I've let him out more times and got him back by waiting for him to land on a perch and putting that into the cage.

This was a trust loss action. Yes better to start over again. Make the cage very bird friendly with lots of toys and food dishes with both food and treats. Better to train him to a T stick at this point instead of your hands. With a T stick you will have control and not get bitten. Also put a perch just outside the cage door so the bird can land on it first. Makes it easier for him to return to the cage. Toys on cage top will help also. If you need help understanding the T stick @JLcribber may be willing to give more details. Please let him have out of cage time every day. Not letting him out is like a punishment.

 

[n’s tiel]

Are you sure he is not a she? While some people do not like drawing a distinction between the cockatiel sexes, in my experience there is one but not a bad one per say. Female cockatiels are hissy and are more likely to put their mouths on your as a warning without actually biting to hurt you, they are generally pacifists. They like to bluff. Frost bluffs often but she is sweet and cuddly as can be and has never actually bitten me but if she gets in a mood she will hiss at me for changing her food bowl...
Could you post a picture of her so we can see?
Frost has been hissing since I got her, I have learned she means nothing by it. Sometimes I will try to rub her head and she will "huff" and put her mouth on me, then happily allow me to pet her. She also throws hissing, grumbling tantrums when it is time for her to go back into her cage, Zephaniah does not he simply says something that sounds like "Mm-Oh!" and runs away to avoid capture. He says "oh, oh oh!" sometimes when something happens that bothers him (like the budgie breaking into his cage) but he does not hiss unless he is genuinely scared or angry.

Also if you got him from a pet store it is quite possible he is older and needs a little more tlc, I was considering getting my first cockatiel from a chain pet store, perhaps the same one you got yours from, before I got Frost, but all the shopkeepers told me that I would have to be careful, they are skittish. Which is totally normal as these birds are not used to human interaction so you must teach him humans are nice.
It is also possible that towel incident frightened him and he is scared of you doing it again. In that case it will take time but he will come around. Im sure it will work out for you and him

This is him, I was told he was male by the pet shop but they did say he’s young so we can’t be totally sure.

 

[n’s tiel]

I agree, it sounds good to start from step 1 again.
When I first had my aggressive cockatiel, I'd sit besides his cage for an hour a day and not pay attention to him so he'd see that I'm not a threat and get used to being close.

Perhaps keeping him in his cage for a while will be beneficial, just to avoid the stress for him flying away in a panic.

Based on my feral bird, I do believe any cockatiel can open up and gain trust given time and careful management.

His cage is by my desk so when i’m working i’m sat by him doing my own thing while he does his. I will try and increase the time I do this as it’s usually around 2 hours per day.

 

[JaneLane]

@N's tiel what a beautiful bird you have, appears to be a cinnamon pearl with. Pearl is sex linked and since it is females who have mismatched chromosomes in the bird world the chances are higher that you have a girl than a boy, since it only takes one sex linked gene for a female to be a pearl and two for a male. But not necassarily if he is a he, those pearls will go away and he will just be brown. If not she will remain a pearl visually forever.
Your lovely bird looks just like my Frost, she is a two year old cinnamon pearl pied hen. Time will tell if your baby's pearls will stick around This is Frost.

 

[scrape]

Sounds like you need a better approach to putting him in the cage. I think you should continue to let him out, you just need a better way to put him back. Try putting millet or his favorite treat in the cage and just wait it out.
In my experience, my cockatiel seemed to enjoy the control of choosing when to go in. Just make sure you have the time. It also helped to ask him to step up and put him on his cage... not in it... but on it so he it made it easier for him.
Good luck with that cutie

 

[n’s tiel]

This was a trust loss action. Yes better to start over again. Make the cage very bird friendly with lots of toys and food dishes with both food and treats. Better to train him to a T stick at this point instead of your hands. With a T stick you will have control and not get bitten. Also put a perch just outside the cage door so the bird can land on it first. Makes it easier for him to return to the cage. Toys on cage top will help also. If you need help understanding the T stick @JLcribber may be willing to give more details. Please let him have out of cage time every day. Not letting him out is like a punishment.

He has a few different toys in his cage, one of which he likes to play fight (i think) with. When he comes out, i have a 'playground' which goes on top of his cage which he enjoys. I'm just wary that i let him out and cant get him back in again, i don't want to have to catch him again.

 

[n’s tiel]

Sounds like you need a better approach to putting him in the cage. I think you should continue to let him out, you just need a better way to put him back. Try putting millet or his favorite treat in the cage and just wait it out.
In my experience, my cockatiel seemed to enjoy the control of choosing when to go in. Just make sure you have the time. It also helped to ask him to step up and put him on his cage... not in it... but on it so he it made it easier for him.
Good luck with that cutie

Hi, I really want him to be allowed out but we don't have the 'Step Up' down yet! He is very wary of my hands unless I make an extension from the perch ie he just walks from where he is onto my hand so i dont think he realises hes on my hand. I don't want to let him out if im stressing him out when it's time to go back in.

 

[n’s tiel]

@N's tiel what a beautiful bird you have, appears to be a cinnamon pearl with. Pearl is sex linked and since it is females who have mismatched chromosomes in the bird world the chances are higher that you have a girl than a boy, since it only takes one sex linked gene for a female to be a pearl and two for a male. But not necassarily if he is a he, those pearls will go away and he will just be brown. If not she will remain a pearl visually forever.
Your lovely bird looks just like my Frost, she is a two year old cinnamon pearl pied hen. Time will tell if your baby's pearls will stick around This is Frost.
View attachment 319280

Oh wow! What a surprise I wanted a boy because I was worried about having the eggs to deal with. If he is a girl, when will he start laying eggs?

 

[n’s tiel]

I got my Tiel about 2 months ago from a petshop (no breeders around me) and they told me he's about 12 weeks old. We made slow progress but he eventually would sit on my hand and eat his seed when I put it next to a perch but was more hesitant to perch on a finger.

I've let him free a handful of times and he flies a bit but usually is quite content to just sit on top of his cage. He escaped the first time and I had to towel him back in but he didn't seem too shaken by it, he was eating out of my hand again etc and I've let him out more times and got him back by waiting for him to land on a perch and putting that into the cage.

Recently he is started nipping me and hissing at me more and more and if I let him out he refuses to go back in, he flies around and tires himself out eventually just hisses at me profusely. He is much more wary around my hands and bites me often. It's as if he doesn't trust me anymore! I don't want him to have to stay in his cage all the time, I want to be able to handle him and give him affection but I don't want him to be distressed. I'm a first time bird owner so I need advice as I really don't want to do the wrong thing.

I'm considering starting training again from square one but I'm frightened that he hates me now! Any advice?

Oh he's also started doing this thing where, whenever i move he will stand on one leg and spread out one wing and stare at me. I don't know if this is just stretching or whether he's trying to look intimidating ?

 

[Ripshod]

Any time I've let a new birb out of the cage I've made sure I have plenty of time (at least 3 hours) and no food outside of the cage so they go back when they get hungry.

is just stretching or whether he's trying to look intimidating ?

More like he's getting ready to escape from you. He may be seeing you as a predator. Is there any way you can move the cage away from your desk, like the other side of the room?

If he is a girl, when will he start laying eggs?

Possibly never. You don't really need to worry so much about it.

 

[Fuzzy]

Agree along the lines of Ripshod's response. Bring him out half an hour or more before you are due to slot his food bowls into his cage so that he goes back in himself when he's hungry. He has to know roughly when to expect his meals though - know the routine. That's how I worked it with Ollie my previously untame Orange-winged Amazon. It worked so well he was able to come out of his cage before I went to work. He was out whilst I made their breakfast, then as soon as I slotted in his breakfast bowl, in he would swoop. Same for the evening meal. I would only shut the cage door when he had a morsel of food in his mouth so that he would pair the shutting of the door with a good experience (the taste of the food). Then gradually I increased the time he was out.

Sounds like your tiel is nipping and hissing because he doesn't want to go back into his cage, ie. it is more reinforcing to be out! So think about how to make it more reinforcing for him to go in again.... slotting in the food bowls is a good one. If he's taking treats from your hand, reinforce his stepping into his cage with a big fat treat! He doesn't hate you - he's not liking what you are about to do to him - put him in his cage. Keep pairing yourself with lovely treats. That way he will look forward to interaction with you.

What's his/her name?

He is very wary of my hands unless I make an extension from the perch ie he just walks from where he is onto my hand so i dont think he realises hes on my hand.

That's great!! Remember to make stepping onto your hand reinforcing so that he will repeat the behaviour in future. A treat works beautifully as it is an unlearned reinforcer. Later on, you can fade out the treats as more natural reinforcers will take over (eg. he will step up because he want to be with you, etc.) But for now, reinforce with a treat EVERY time! Very important when learning a new behaviour.

 

[Hawk12237]

I got my Tiel about 2 months ago from a petshop (no breeders around me) and they told me he's about 12 weeks old. We made slow progress but he eventually would sit on my hand and eat his seed when I put it next to a perch but was more hesitant to perch on a finger.

I've let him free a handful of times and he flies a bit but usually is quite content to just sit on top of his cage. He escaped the first time and I had to towel him back in but he didn't seem too shaken by it, he was eating out of my hand again etc and I've let him out more times and got him back by waiting for him to land on a perch and putting that into the cage.

Recently he is started nipping me and hissing at me more and more and if I let him out he refuses to go back in, he flies around and tires himself out eventually just hisses at me profusely. He is much more wary around my hands and bites me often. It's as if he doesn't trust me anymore! I don't want him to have to stay in his cage all the time, I want to be able to handle him and give him affection but I don't want him to be distressed. I'm a first time bird owner so I need advice as I really don't want to do the wrong thing.

I'm considering starting training again from square one but I'm frightened that he hates me now! Any advice?

Well for one, those from pet smart are rarely hand trained.
Those take much longer than 2 months to come to trust.
As for training, it's not always going back to square one.
It's repitition, routine almost to the key, that is what they learn remember and understand.

 

[JaneLane]

@N's tiel Frist didnt start laying eggs until she was one year old and only because my budgie laid an egg first and she wanted to keep up I think. Don't worry about egg laying it is normal and as long as you keep an eyee on her and her diet she should be fine, if she is a she Wing spreading is often a side of dominance and more often seen in females than males and is the birds way of claiming their space, sometimes ot is also a form of exercise, I also heard from a breeder that some birds do it to show how attractive they feel(which makes sense because Frost has done it to my sister's budgie who she has a crush on and was laying a huge amount of eggs when they lived next to each other.) So maybe your bird is feeling good about him/herself .

This picture is dark but here is an example of Frost doing "batwings" she was in a very good mood that day, so I dont think it was a dominance thing. She doesnt flap while doing this just hangs. Is thisbwhat your bird is doing?

 

[n’s tiel]

Hiya,

This morning he was stood on my hand and I have let him out the cage for a bit, he’s been a bit bitey but not too much. Just if my hand was above his head he’d bite. He also gently bites before he stands on my hand but I think this is just to make sure it’s sturdy.

He’s still pretty clueless with the step up command but hopefully he will be ok soon. Will try with a treat to get him back inside hopefully all goes okay!

 

[scrape]

Hi, I really want him to be allowed out but we don't have the 'Step Up' down yet! He is very wary of my hands unless I make an extension from the perch ie he just walks from where he is onto my hand so i dont think he realises hes on my hand. I don't want to let him out if im stressing him out when it's time to go back in.

That's okay too if he doesn't step It's not necessary. Just try and time it to when he's hungry enough he'll go in for a treat, or dinner.

Hiya,

This morning he was stood on my hand and I have let him out the cage for a bit, he’s been a bit bitey but not too much. Just if my hand was above his head he’d bite. He also gently bites before he stands on my hand but I think this is just to make sure it’s sturdy.

He’s still pretty clueless with the step up command but hopefully he will be ok soon. Will try with a treat to get him back inside hopefully all goes okay!

Sounds like you're managing pretty well

 

[Ripshod]

He also gently bites before he stands on my hand but I think this is just to make sure it’s sturdy.

You got that right.

This is really good progress already, you're both learning more about each other - you've learned not to approach with your hand over him and he has learned to trust a little more. Small steps soon add up.