Should I rehome or Euthanize? (looking for advice, not judgement)

[macawpower58]

I'd like to make one other observation.
Both of your birds are young, and in the beginning of their hormonal urges.
It's also spring, and this is when hormonal behavior is the heaviest.
Young birds often don't handle this well, and aggression is common.
What you're seeing now, is not how they'll handle this all their lives.
Hormones always will surge, but not in such a dramatic way as they mature a bit more.
If you want to keep them, patience and time are what you'll need.
Your birds are not lost cases, just inexperienced hormonal youngsters.
I do hope we can help in whatever you decide.

 

[shibaak]

As I attempted to convey, there's nothing wrong with rehoming birds.
What's stopping you from allowing them to use their expertise to find a suitable new home?

My Jericho was rehomed because he chased the previous family's grandkids.
I have no kids or grandkids, so something that was a problem for somebody else is not a problem for Jericho in his new home with me.

Because despite your success with your birds, the reality is that there is a very very high chance that the next owner will not be successful with my birds. If so, they may end up in a rehoming cycle, and I will not be able to stop it. I don't want that to happen at all. I love them both and I am not going to let that happen to them. I prefer to spend some money and send them to the US sanctuary where they will enjoy a life with other parrots than to rehome them and not know what will happen to them. I want the best for them and for me that does not mean rehoming, because of the high chance of them going into a rehoming cycle, and possibly getting stuck with an owner who does not provide them with the best situation.

I understand that not all owners are bad and there might even be one who is actually good, but the chances are very slim with my birds, and I want to ensure the best possible outcome.

 

[shibaak]

I'd like to make one other observation.
Both of your birds are young, and in the beginning of their hormonal urges.
It's also spring, and this is when hormonal behavior is the heaviest.
Young birds often don't handle this well, and aggression is common.
What you're seeing now, is not how they'll handle this all their lives.
Hormones always will surge, but not in such a dramatic way as they mature a bit more.
If you want to keep them, patience and time are what you'll need.
Your birds are not lost cases, just inexperienced hormonal youngsters.
I do hope we can help in whatever you decide.

Thank you.
Do you mean that her behavior changes back when her hormones subside in a couple of months?

If that's the case, I am fine with trying to handle them for a while without the presence of my husband around, and maybe keeping them in their cage for some hours during the day, or keeping them free in their room, and wait for when she becomes normal again. There are temporary things I can do to avoid her attacks until she becomes normal again. Maybe even clip her wings for a couple of months as the other member suggested. We definitely have less problem with Tutu who cannot fly as well as Mango. He is a lot less feisty.

 

[shibaak]

I would not euthanize. It seems like Mango has become a territorial/defensive female now that she is bonded and it's pushed your home life past the point of pleasant. You said you don't have a rescue nearby, that's totally understandable. But there are other options. I would advertise them in local groups, call any nearby zoos or similar facilities. There's bound to be someone who wants them.

And in the meantime, if my bird was flying to severely attack me and regularly drawing blood, they would absolutely get their wings clipped as a safety measure. I've found that a couple of my birds are significantly less bitey when they are clipped. They no longer feel like they have free reign to control the household. Your quality of life matters, too. I know that's not everyone's shared perspective, just my two cents.

Thank you very much. I didn't think about this at all. But come to think of it, Tutu definitely is less feisty because he cannot fly. I have less problems with him because he knows he cannot rule the house with flying! Mango has just become so feisty and bity because she knows she can fly away and there is no harm coming from my husband or I at any time. So she is just not stopping! If her behaviour is temporary and clipping can stop her from attacking until she becomes better, I am fine doing that until she becomes normal again!

 

[Tanya]

We call it the "power clip" at our house. It is a light clip that takes just enough outer primaries (3-5 per side, even on both sides) so that they lose power for a dive bomb without losing the ability to fly. A hard clip can cause a bird to lose the ability to correct for a fall and lead to injury. Please don't do the "chicken wing" clip which removes all flight feathers and can cause serious injuries if there is a fall.

 

[Tyrion]

Where abouts are you in Alberta ? There are two rescues that I know of ..one in Calgary and one in Edmonton that are good with rehoming their birds ..also I was wondering when you did separate them how long did you give it I would think if you didnt give it at least 2 weeks to see if they would accept the change then maybe you could try again and give it longer .. Also what about rehoming one bird and keeping the other I know thats not ideal but it might help ...I was thinking if you do decide to rehome them I would separate each going to a different home might give them a better chance at finding the right home ...

 

[macawpower58]

While not to worry you, these types of changes can take a few years to calm. Don't expect too much too soon.
Yes, they may calm once spring passes, but usually it's them slowly maturing that really calms them down.
Like teenagers, they learn how to handle their behavior over time.

I also trimmed my macaw's wings when his hormones made him dangerous.
It was only once, but it did make me feel a bit safer from his attacks.
Wing clipping is hugely controversial, so be aware many will be against any clipping at all.
I believe it's a better option then some other choices. Especially if it's for the short term.

So if you can handle a few years of behavior changes, things most likely will work out.
I had a few hard years, but my bird and I are friends once more.
The relationship has changed though, it's not like when mine was a baby, but I'm okay with that.

 

[TikiMyn]

Is building an aviary not an option? They would have space to be happy while not absolutely having to come out of their cage. I am by no means an expert, but to me it does sound plausible that their hormones are the problem. Perhaps ride it out a few months and see where you and the birds stand then?

 

[Sparkles99]

I’d rehome.

You don’t need a bird rescue. The humane society here & the SPCA across the river both take birds, including medium and large size parrots. And they transfer, including inter-provincially, as needed. They’re all across Canada.

This isn’t the same situation as someone who can’t afford an expensive procedure, like pelvic reconstruction after their dog is hit by a car.

This is you wishing to remain in control while willfully surrendering it simultaneously. That isn’t fair.

These birds are wild & live 30 years. Unlike in the US, you can’t get anything bigger than a budgie on the fly in a chain pet store. So, you knew what you were getting into: you had to seek them out.

Decent people adopt animals & shelters are experts at screening. Do the mature thing by placing someone else above yourself.

 

[macawpower58]

Sparkles, people who don't care, don't ask for help.
Not everyone knows instinctively how to handle life with birds.

 

[Winn]

Hi All,
I have a question about rehoming or euthenizing my bird, and I want no judgement! I am really asking for advice.

I have 2 conures. A green cheek (male named tutu) and a yellow sided (female named mango). Tutu is 2.5 years old, and he was bonded with my husband when Mango came (Mango is 1.5 years old). Tutu was abused before he came to us in the breeder's house. So he was a difficult pet. Since at that time, my husband worked feom home, he bonded with him, and never had a very good relationship with me. He bites me and anyone other than my husband all the time. He draws blood as he bites very very badly. My husband was the one handling him all the time.

When Mango came, she came from a good breeder and ahe was mentally stable. Tutu and Mango took some time to bond, but they finally did bond, and they even laid eggs this spring (I boiled the eggs because we didn't want them to have babies).

Mango was a very easy bird. Super cute and great. However, she has recently become super jealous. If he sees my husband, she flies to attack him as hard as she can from wherever she is. She bites him very bad, much worse than we thought she could and she does it non-stop. I have to hold her in my hands so she cannot fly, if my husband is around. And God forbid, if she sees my husband with Tutu, she does everything to get to them and bite my husband non-stop. She is showing the same behavior towards everyone except me.

IIt has become very difficult and almost impossible to handle them. I cannot handle Tutu and my husband cannot handle Mango and is regularly and severely attacked by Mango. I have tried everything to stop her attacks, but they haven't worked.

I have not found any solution other than rehoming or euthanizing them, and I don't know what to do. If I rehome them, there is guarantee that they will be in a rehoming cycle for ever, as they cannot be handled by anyone. So I am thinking of euthanizing them. But they are relatively healthy birds that I should euthanize and I cannot get myself to do that.

What would you do if you were me? What else can I do?

I understand that you're feeling torn and wanting to do what you think is best for your birds.. and I understand your worry about where they may end up.
I personally feel like they deserve a chance at life. It would be a hard decision to euthanize them because of a concern they may not find a forever home.
I recently acquired a dog. I didn't want another dog. I ran her off 4 times and she came back. She sleeps on my chest. She is a pain in the butt. She ate my notebook, my phone charger, a shoe, and a flashlight (etc...) I don't know who left her here, but I know why. I think she may have been kicked in the ribs because she yelped every time I touched her right side for the first week here.
I have learned to adapt my habits to accommodate her... not expecting her to change to please me.
Sometimes a pet is more than we can handle. There is no shame in admitting that.
I personally feel there is someone who can roll with your birds' issues and give them a happy life. It's not easy, but I think they deserve a chance.

 

[.........]

If you're going to rehome, I think you should either rehome them yourself or get a bird specific rescue.
I'm not sure about other places in the world, but I wasn't too impressed about how the SPCA I got one of my pigeons from screened, and although I don't know she was kept in this cage all the time in the photo she was on a incorrectly sized dowel perch in what appears to be a cage too small for a pigeon. The screening was made for cats and dogs, they quite literally asked me if I had a fence around my property, for a bird. I'm sure they try treat their birds well but in this case they just weren't, probably from inexperience or lack of bird specific resources. I've looked at bird rescues screenings, and they are much, much better and more relevant than a cat or dog screening from a cat and dog rescue. Just sharing my experience, and that if I was rehoming my birds I personally wouldn't be sending them to a general animal rescue.

 

[Laurie]

People have given you a lot of great advice. I do not think that you even need to consider euthanizing as an option. Birds respond to their environment and their own internal instincts and feelings so how they act in your home with your family are not a guarantee of how they will act elseware. People who work at rescues care deeply about the animals in their care and are often skilled at matching them with a new family that will work out better. You should not be afraid of a rescue if you can find one that will care for and work with the birds.

Also, I think it is unreasonable to expect that a new home will treat your birds just as you do. There are many ways to keep birds healthy and happy so it is limiting to think that they will need to be treated the same way you treat them. Also, since they are behaving in ways that cause you to question their suitability as pets this would actually suggest that some changes to the environment, people or the way they are cared for might be helpful. I am not saying you don't care for them just that sometimes a particular animal just isn't a good fit for one family but is for another. I would give them the chance.

Just as an example. I recently got a new bird. He is new to me. The two main reasons he was rehomed was that he constantly attacked the husband for the last 3 years and he was really wanting to breed with their other female pet of the same species. This wasn't in itself unanticipated but unfortunately, she was not interested. His attempts to attract her attention and make him his wife were stressing her out and leading to plucking and other issues. It simply wasn't good for her. You might label him as aggressive but I have had him for three weeks and I would not call him aggressive at all. I have not been bitten once. I can see 100 times I could have been bitten if I didn't handle it right but I know caiques and we have been getting along great. I keep thinking maybe he will bit but so far he is just very beaky and grabby but no real aggression. Not even any aggressive posturing. He really is a good boy, just not the right fit for everyone.

He was rehomed to me. He is a wonderfully social bird and loves me. I don't know if he will like my husband or not but it will not matter because in our living arrangements with our birds he doesn't have to interact with them. All my birds are pets first and are tame and social but I also provide them with a same species mate if I can. Hopefully, I can find him one that likes him. If not then he will have to be a single boy but so far so good.

I only mention this because there are some similarities. The previous owner was a wonderful, experienced bird keeper and her birds are doing well but this one bird just didn't quite fit for her family or flock and she felt that they were rehoming was the best option. I agree and we found each other and I love the little guy and he seems quite happy here so far.

I am sure you can find a solution. Good luck to you.

 

[Clueless]

Please don't euthanize.

My first thought when reading your post was hormones.

When I first got my two amazons, they had a very light wing clip. Like someone else said, you don't want a heavy clip...... birds could be hurt badly by one of those.

 

[shibaak]

I’d rehome.

You don’t need a bird rescue. The humane society here & the SPCA across the river both take birds, including medium and large size parrots. And they transfer, including inter-provincially, as needed. They’re all across Canada.

This isn’t the same situation as someone who can’t afford an expensive procedure, like pelvic reconstruction after their dog is hit by a car.

This is you wishing to remain in control while willfully surrendering it simultaneously. That isn’t fair.

These birds are wild & live 30 years. Unlike in the US, you can’t get anything bigger than a budgie on the fly in a chain pet store. So, you knew what you were getting into: you had to seek them out.

Decent people adopt animals & shelters are experts at screening. Do the mature thing by placing someone else above yourself.

I am not sure why you are so judgemental and aggressive in your comment. As the title says, I am not looking for judgement! I am asking for help from those who are willing to help and share knowledge without judgment, to see what my options are (I have received many helpful comments so far).

It might look unfair to you. But I love my birds to death. Both of them, even Tutu who bites me! I have had so much fun with them, and I know that they do trust me, and that's very important to me. The fact that they bite us and attack us so often, is actually because they know no harm is ever going to come from us.

Whether it's unfair or not, I do care about the quality of their life and I want to stay in control until I am reasonably sure they get the best possible option. If I am reasonably satisfied that there is a good rescue or home for them, I will happily give them up. But I have had birds my whole life, and I know they are very difficult pets. These two are specially difficult, because Tutu was an abused bird from when he was born. He was traumatized from day one that I got him from the breeder. Mango has become territorial and attacks everyone now, except me. I have had birds for many years and I know these two are specially difficult.

So If they do not go to a very good home with an experienced person, they will go into a rehoming cycle, and I don't want that to happen to them! Because I do not believe in living at any cost. I want them to have a good quality of life. If I have to spend money for the rest of their life, to have them taken care of in a good paid rescue where they can maintain a good quality of life, I will gladly commit to that. But I am not just going to give them up to whatever rescue, and hope for the best!

 

[shibaak]

We call it the "power clip" at our house. It is a light clip that takes just enough outer primaries (3-5 per side, even on both sides) so that they lose power for a dive bomb without losing the ability to fly. A hard clip can cause a bird to lose the ability to correct for a fall and lead to injury. Please don't do the "chicken wing" clip which removes all flight feathers and can cause serious injuries if there is a fall.

Yes. I meant the same. Tutu unfortunately was hard clipped and that damaged his ability to fly forever. If it helps with less attacks, I will be able to keep them. Hopefully she becomes calmer as time passes as well.

 

[shibaak]

Where abouts are you in Alberta ? There are two rescues that I know of ..one in Calgary and one in Edmonton that are good with rehoming their birds ..also I was wondering when you did separate them how long did you give it I would think if you didnt give it at least 2 weeks to see if they would accept the change then maybe you could try again and give it longer .. Also what about rehoming one bird and keeping the other I know thats not ideal but it might help ...I was thinking if you do decide to rehome them I would separate each going to a different home might give them a better chance at finding the right home ...

I am in Edmonton. I talked to Meika's. He is very experienced and I do trust his judgement. He knows them both and he also said that they were going to be very difficult for rehoming.

I cannot think of separating them again at all. They would die out of sadness. They love each other so much. That's cruel to do to them. I separated them for about 5 days. The whole time, Tutu was screaming and finally started plucking, and Mango was so sad, and did not even get out of her cage. When they were back together, for a full day, they were just preening, grooming, and kissing each other. I regret doing that. It took some time for me to gain their trust again that I wasn't going to separate them.

I know what you mean by giving them a better chance, but that's gonna be at the cost of a big heartbreak for them both.

 

[shibaak]

While not to worry you, these types of changes can take a few years to calm. Don't expect too much too soon.
Yes, they may calm once spring passes, but usually it's them slowly maturing that really calms them down.
Like teenagers, they learn how to handle their behavior over time.

I also trimmed my macaw's wings when his hormones made him dangerous.
It was only once, but it did make me feel a bit safer from his attacks.
Wing clipping is hugely controversial, so be aware many will be against any clipping at all.
I believe it's a better option then some other choices. Especially if it's for the short term.

So if you can handle a few years of behavior changes, things most likely will work out.
I had a few hard years, but my bird and I are friends once more.
The relationship has changed though, it's not like when mine was a baby, but I'm okay with that.

Frankly if a light trim can make her a bit calmer and less feisty while still being able to fly, I may be fine with that. We need to just be a little careful.

 

[shibaak]

Is building an aviary not an option? They would have space to be happy while not absolutely having to come out of their cage. I am by no means an expert, but to me it does sound plausible that their hormones are the problem. Perhaps ride it out a few months and see where you and the birds stand then?

That's actually a great suggestion and I thought about that too. But it's very cold here. Outdoor aviary isn't an option. For indoor ones, I do not have a big room.

 

[Clueless]

So If they do not go to a very good home with an experienced person, they will go into a rehoming cycle . . .

Bull feathers. Seriously. Bull.

Read my name? I rescued 2 blue fronted DNA make amazons that were both wild caught. I didn't have an ounce of bird knowledge or experience.

Secret isn't a loving bird by any stretch of the imagination. I love her and medicate her twice daily despite the way she'd like to chew me up. Hubby is there for her, too. He doesn't think I know he talks to her when I'm out of the room

MC turned into my buddy after a few years. We walked a horrible walk together and he nearly made it through multiple surgeries but that tumor wound up being cancer.

Just saying don't lump all non- bird folks together. Give them a chance. They could have hearts waiting to open.