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Parrotlet bathing

Gribouille

Rollerblading along the road
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Norway
I've been practicing this concept. It's been helping my daily panic attacks a ton! I wished someone had taught me how to be in this mindset a million years ago!
it's one thing to worry & think about how to change a situation. It's a whole other scenario to get sick with concern over stuff you cannot change.

:hug5: Rain
Boy am I glad I never was like that, you have much to be proud of if you managed to change that mindset, it is very hard to change how you react :jillone: but yes, if you cannot change it, just take the best of the situation and think it will go well at the end, possibly thinking ahead about what you can do if things end up this or that way. Being active and prepared is the best way to tackle unknown situations.
There is a guy holding conferences for people with anxiety around here, one of the things I heard he says is "Will your daughter's flight be safer if you worry? No, so quit worrying. Whatever happens happens, and you worrying will not change the outcome" Which is very true.. :angel2:
 

Rain Bow

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Hubbys a major worrier too! So now I'm trying to change his mindset too! I feed off of him, & it makes things worse. Its a work in process. I was going to a counselor. We tried a few things. They've helped. But its going to take time to master the skills. My guess is it will be conscious effort forever.

Your right the outcome is what it is. So unless my worry ='s a brainstorm that will change the outcome, I'm trying to "give the stress away". Admittedly, my panic was a learned behavior as a child. I'm trying to retrain my brain, & even tho the counselor never told me that specifically. I wonder if I'd have gotten a bird instead of all my fur babies, if this lesson would have been learned sooner? Panic, moving too fast, doesn't work well w/ bird s.
:lol:

:grouphug3: Rain
 

Gribouille

Rollerblading along the road
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I wonder if I'd have gotten a bird instead of all my fur babies, if this lesson would have been learned sooner? Panic, moving too fast, doesn't work well w/ bird s.
That's true, but they aren't really relaxing either and they are quick to jump out the window, which doesn't help panic attacks. But if you are surrounded with people resorting to panic when things are rough, it makes it more difficult for to you keep your cool. Is Hubby also going to a counselor? Stress is a tool, it is supposed to make you more efficient when the need for quick decision is there. So if stress doesn't help but rather paralyzes you, it is not the good one and it should be stopped. My mother is worrying for all and everything and sometimes I wonder if it is not her way to feel that she loves someone, that she is alive, needed, important... Do you feel that way? That if you don't worry you are not really loving, not really caring?
As for me, I get annoyed because when she worries I feel she doesn't trust me. I have 2 kids and I would have many reasons to worry, but they are clever and capable kids so I have no reason to worry, I trust they would tell me if something goes wrong because they know they can come to me, or I would see if something's wrong. And if not, then we'll manage if a situation arises. The same with my pets, I am the provider for food, shelter and fun, I love thinking of new things for their wellbeing, I want them to feel they can trust me so they don't need to be nervous and prepared for the scary unknown.
 

Rain Bow

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Mine comes from abuse mainly when I was a kid. It was too much responsibility to young & getting hit if I screwed up. Which was alot. Hubby's a what if kind of person. No he's not (counseling) but It'd probably help him too.

My response to the what ifs lately has been... or we could be all dead. His what ifs have been overwhelming me & insensitive yes but it's all I can say just to make it stop. Nothing else seems to work.

Funny you mentioned the jump out the window thing. I have a pain condition where that fight or flight response is stuck. I swell even tho injurys gone. I feel pain where injury has healed. I probably understand out fids flight response better than most. Buddy makes me laugh ALL the time. He's been better than all the dr.ing & pills & treatments all 10+ years put together.

I've been trying your thought process w/ my husband re. Our daughter. Shes an adult now, & I keep saying she's @ the age where speeches about what could happen don't work anymore. You have to let her fail if she needs us she'll come to us. I'm not sure if it's working or not. But her muffler fell off on the way here to my house today. She brought it in today (yes into my house) Hubby 's a mechanic. So maybe!!! :blink::faint::D


Thanks for listening!

:bighug: Rain
 

Gribouille

Rollerblading along the road
Avenue Veteran
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Mine comes from abuse mainly when I was a kid. It was too much responsibility to young & getting hit if I screwed up.
I'm sorry... Parents don't realize how much their short-term solutions mess up their kids lives in the long-term...


speeches about what could happen don't work anymore. You have to let her fail if she needs us she'll come to us. I'm not sure if it's working or not. But her muffler fell off on the way here to my house today. She brought it in today (yes into my house) Hubby 's a mechanic. So maybe!!! :blink::faint::D
I believe the best way to be a parent is to teach your kids that there'll be stones on the way. How to go around them, remove them, or patch up if they fall. Removing the stones for them will teach them nothing and the day you are not there to do it they are helpless...


Thanks for listening! :bighug: Rain
:hug2:
 

JFK

Moving in
Joined
9/3/21
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Real Name
Justin
I'm starting to wish I had long hair... We have a customer at the pet store I work at who has a Parrotlet hiding in her hair every time she comes in!
I’m bald so I guess I’m screwed with this option
 
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