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New (human) baby soon...

Nimily

Meeting neighbors
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Joined
7/22/12
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51
Location
North Idaho
Real Name
Holly Madison
Hi everyone! I am the proud momma of a Lesser Sulfur Crested Cockatoo named Crocky, and a CAG named Henry.

My husband and I are trying to start a family, and I wanted to know if anyone has any advice about how to make this a smooth transition for the birds. I'm not really worried about Henry because he sticks to his perch most of the time, but I'm very very worried about Crocky.

Crocky is my BABY. She is seriously my favorite person in the whole world. That being said, she is very possessive of me if I try to have a dog or a cat on my lap. She will lunge at them and attack. She is very friendly with other (full grown) humans, but she's never been around kids or babies. I'm scared that if we have a new baby in the house, she might fly onto me and attack them (the way she does with the dogs and cats).

Here's the thing. I will never consider re-homing this bird. She is as much a part of my family as any human baby can be. That being said, we do want kids. And before we get pregnant, I want to have a game plan to make sure this is all going to be ok. I am worried that she will feel like she has been replaced (not just her, but all of my animals... but she's the most sensitive out of all of them, so she's the one who really worries me). I need to know how to go about making sure that doesn't happen.

I realize I'm a fretter. I was actually laying in bed awake last night worrying about who will watch the birds when I go into labor if it's a long delivery, then I started to think about how she might attack the baby while I'm holding it, and how would I stop that from happening? I have PCOS and might not even be able to get pregnant, so I realize I'm jumping the gun here, but I can't help it.

We want to adopt some children as well, and I have seriously wondered if it might be easier for the birds if we just started with kids that are a little bit older.

Does anyone have any good advice for us? Any thoughts would be appreciated.
 

Tiel Feathers

Joyriding the Neighborhood
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I've never been in this situation, but do you have any friends with kids or babies? Maybe you can bring some kids around and he can get used to them a bit. Also, if you do have children, keep his routine the same as much as you can, and give him attention when the baby is around. You could give him a treat every time you walk by his cage with the baby in your arms. For the safety of your baby, however, I would keep him caged if your baby is in the same room and he is prone to dive bombing. Maybe you can teach him to station or target so he is less likely to attack. I'm sure others will chime in who have had to deal with this situation!
 

Pipsqueak

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Your thought about adopting older kids to make it easier on the birds is absurd. Adoption is such a big life altering change as is having a baby. I can guarantee you that this little human will become you most favorite person in the world and will take all of you as it should be. I had a dog when I brought home our baby and since we did not know how he would react we kept them separated , I never left the baby unattended with the dog , later on the baby gates helped too . To keep the routine with the birds would certainly help but reality is that a tiny human being might cross your plans big time .
 

Nimily

Meeting neighbors
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Joined
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Messages
51
Location
North Idaho
Real Name
Holly Madison
Your thought about adopting older kids to make it easier on the birds is absurd. Adoption is such a big life altering change as is having a baby.
I'm sorry that you feel that my idea to adopt older children is absurd, and I'm sorry that you feel the need to make me feel bad for posting my feelings.
My husband and I plan to adopt older children eventually regardless of whether or not we have our own biological children first. Considering that my birds will hopefully live as long as I do, I think that it's worth taking their feelings into consideration. I loathe it when I see people giving away their pets because they had a new baby. I will not be one of those people. I have raised a child that was not my own before and am very much aware of the connection that a parent can have with a child. But my birds are also members of my family. My concern with the baby is that it might remind my cockatoo of a cat or a dog, which she likes to attack. Hence the "skipping the baby phase" idea.

I've never been in this situation, but do you have any friends with kids or babies? Maybe you can bring some kids around and he can get used to them a bit. Also, if you do have children, keep his routine the same as much as you can, and give him attention when the baby is around. You could give him a treat every time you walk by his cage with the baby in your arms. For the safety of your baby, however, I would keep him caged if your baby is in the same room and he is prone to dive bombing. Maybe you can teach him to station or target so he is less likely to attack. I'm sure others will chime in who have had to deal with this situation!
Unfortunately we don't have any friends nearby with kids. It would be awesome if we did! Ok, we will certainly keep that in mind as much as possible. We don't cage our birds except to sleep, but I'm sure we can figure something out. Thanks for the *polite* and useful feedback.
 

Birdbabe

Ripping up the road
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I'm not a parent, but I'm pretty sure the bird will be involved in every day, minute, and hour of new baby, which will be a great bonding adventure!
 

Pipsqueak

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I am sorry that I upset you , that wasn't my intention. I meant that it probably doesn't make a difference to the birds if it is an infant or a toddler and bigger kids need cuddling and contact too. I feel the same about my pets and like to think that we have them until natural death. It was not easy when I brought a baby home , there are hormones ( talking about the human this time ) , it is tiring and a lot of time goes towards the care of the child , of course the dog got less attention and less walks too.
Keeping the birds in the cage the first times around the baby will probably be saver and to have one handle the baby and one the bird when you let them come close to each other first.
 

fluffypoptarts

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@Nimily Kudos to you for thinking so much of the birds and not being willing to dump them the second human children might come into the picture. I can't possibly "like" that enough!

P.S. Your favorite person may forever remain a bird, and there's not a thing wrong with that. ;)
 

Nimily

Meeting neighbors
Avenue Veteran
Joined
7/22/12
Messages
51
Location
North Idaho
Real Name
Holly Madison
@Nimily Kudos to you for thinking so much of the birds and not being willing to dump them the second human children might come into the picture. I can't possibly "like" that enough!

P.S. Your favorite person may forever remain a bird, and there's not a thing wrong with that. ;)
Thanks so much for the kind words and the understanding. My mom and my husband totally get it. My dad's side of the family thinks I'm completely and utterly insane. LOL
 
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