Looking for Advice! How do people decide to rehome their parrots?

[jhaylo]

Genuine question.

I'm just in a weird space so I apologize in advance.

For some background I have (3) birds, two budgies - one about 6-7 years old, the other about 4 or 5. I have a zebra finch, who's 2. (I also own a frog but he's not as relevant, he's just a little guy.)

My younger budgie, Benj, developed AGY this past summer - for lack of revealing too much, I am still a highschool student, so I guess in that sense it came at a "good time". It was hard for him and me too. I'm lucky, as Benj is blind, he's not cohabitated with my other budgie in a long time - they don't get along well except through cage bars, so they've always just chatted to eachother. He had to stay overnight in a vet hospital about an hour and a half from my house to the tune of $1000+. Then my other bird developed symptoms of AGY, but tested negative.

The past several months have just been one potential illness after another, so imagine how I felt seeing symptoms in Benji again about a week ago. It was just, like devastating. I have a vet appointment for them both in just a week or so, and they're both stable. I am praying for no more overnights or emergency appointments.

It sounds awful, but sitting here today deep-cleaning for them, I feel really defeated. I used to want to work with animals, make my love for them my life - and I do not want that anymore. I'm becoming afraid I don't really even want to do this for the next several years. Sure, they're pet store birds, but I take pretty good care of them and they could be in my life for another 4-8 years, or more. I just don't know if I can take it.

I've had mental health issues, and in the past, they've been the thing to get me out of them, but I think it's become counter intuitive. I don't want to pretend that's the reason for this though. I want a life, outside of my birds, and I know that's not fair to them. I feel terrible I wasn't smarter when I was younger and took them in, smarter at all - I just feel awful. I don't want to give them up, but I don't know if I can envision 8 more years of my life like this. I just want to go to college, to live my life, a clean floor I don't have to vaccum almost daily. My birds and I share a room. I bought a new AC just because of them. An air purifier. Two pieces of furniture. A floor mat. Every single toy, bin... I set aside 40% of the money I make for them. I love them so, much, and I feel terrible because it's getting much harder for me to feel OK about all this.

(In the realm of mental health, I admit I've had more trouble lately too - but I get proffesional help and historically my birds have always helped, not hurt my mental health. This is a weird reversal for me, but not the driving force behind my conflict.)

I'm just genuinley curious how people make a decision like that, not because they had to for living circumstances, or money... just because they realized they weren't cut out for it. It feels SO, so unfair to them, but so does me living with them for the next several years with this kind of conflict.

I don't know if I can put my parrots through that. I really do love them a lot, with my entire heart. I just, want the best for both of us. We have a very good rescue not far away, that I would trust, but... can I really do that to them? I'm in tears just trying to admit I don't know.

Just looking for some advice, some support. Maybe from people who have been in similar dilemmas, I'd love to know what you did.

TIA. Apologies to those this might upset, I'm just looking to be honest.

 

[Parront]

It sounds as though you are going thru a period of feeling "overwhelmed". Whatever is going on to make you feel this way, I would suggest that you give it time. Talk to your councelor about these feelings. Do not make any rash decisions while you are feeling like this. It sounds as though your birds have been in the past a comfort to you. I think that all of us get frustrated at times at how things are going, and then to add the time it takes to care for the birds makes it feel unmanageable. Only you can make a decesion that is right for you and your birds but again, give it time, talk to your councelor. I feel your pain, good luck

 

[jhaylo]

It sounds as though you are going thru a period of feeling "overwhelmed". Whatever is going on to make you feel this way, I would suggest that you give it time. Talk to your councelor about these feelings. Do not make any rash decisions while you are feeling like this. It sounds as though your birds have been in the past a comfort to you. I think that all of us get frustrated at times at how things are going, and then to add the time it takes to care for the birds makes it feel unmanageable. Only you can make a decesion that is right for you and your birds but again, give it time, talk to your councelor. I feel your pain, good luck

Thank you. I'm absolutley going to slow myself down; I know I get overwhelmed and tend to become avoidant/immediately jump to a conclusion that's not always as neat. I plan to take some time to think about it till at least november (at the earliest) as that will give a lot of things time to settle over here. I am going to keep thinking however, because it's not just the right now, but when I may go to college, etc. etc... I appreciate it. I will be taking some time.