Is it okay

[tlday13]

To realize that you can love a foster bird, but not necessarily think this bird will be a good fit for your family?

I love Jewel... I truly do. But I'm not certain we will be the best forever family for her. My kids make her nervous.. and oddly enough, the younger one is more willing to respect her boundaries than the older child. (Who is mildly autistic). I don't know if her first family had kids, but I'm guessing they didn't.

She (Jewel) has warmed up to me a lot... and I thought that would be awesome being bird's one person. But I'm starting to realize that maybe I'm wanting more of a 'family' bird... one that the kids could at least hold under supervision.. I can respect that Jewel doesn't want that and don't want to force her into a mold that she can't fit into.

I still plan on working the best I can for Jewels diet and interactions... she deserves our best.

But I'm also opening my mind and heart to the idea that loving her might mean letting her move on when our time with her is up (at the end of Dec).

She's my first foster, and I guess I was sorta hoping she would fit right in... and she still might warm up to all of us.. its only been 1 month and that's like a nanosecond in bird time.

I guess I just wanted to "talk" about it to people who might understand. you know?

Tracy

 

[M-Nature]

What kind of bird is Jewel?

 

[Kristy]

Tracy of course it's ok.

Our "job" is to have happy and healthy birds.

Sometimes happiness for them or us could be better. You do what you can then so they best prepared for thier new home.

 

[Beatriz Cazeneuve]

Ahhhh, yes, it's hard to let go a foster but we are here to make sure that their forever home is the best possible situation and, if she doesn't like kids, she is definitely not the bird for you to keep. Very good of you to think of her needs first and your desires second, if everybody who has a bird was like you, we wouldn't have so many unhappy birds out there. Kudos to you!

 

[ortegah]

It's absolutely ok!

 

[tlday13]

What kind of bird is Jewel?

Jewel is a ~3yr old CAG. I wouldn't say she dislikes men, but she does have a preference for women... I believe her first family she was more bonded to the woman (who had a job that took her outside the home alot) and the husband didn't have much to do with her.

She came to us a plucker and we've noticed some improvement already -- she has more "fuzz" (down feathers, I know lol) than she did before.

She is very sweet to me..and if it were just hubby and I in the house we would definitely adopt her...but like I said, the kids make her nervous. We're going to give it the remaining time we have fostering, but I don't know that I'm pinning my hopes on us adopting her. But she will make someone a very sweet bird.

I was afraid after I posted this note that I'd be ... I dunno... criticized. I had one friend tell me "well she's not going to like everyone" (which is true, I know)..and "She's not a toy" (ummm, I'm aware of that!) But at the same time my kids are part of the household and if its not a good fit, its not a good fit. For myself I love her... but I can't ask her to be what she's not and my autistic son just can't seem to understand why she is scared of him.

Sorry to ramble.

Tracy

 

[Birdiemarie]

Even when you bring a new baby bird into the home there is no guarantee it will be a good fit. It's more difficult with a foster bird (or rescue, or adoption) because they come with a history that we don't necessarily have all the facts of so they will react to our home with their own set of fears and/or possible deep entrenched attitudes that will effect and sometimes cement their personalities.

 

[BraveheartDogs]

To realize that you can love a foster bird, but not necessarily think this bird will be a good fit for your family?

I love Jewel... I truly do. But I'm not certain we will be the best forever family for her. My kids make her nervous.. and oddly enough, the younger one is more willing to respect her boundaries than the older child. (Who is mildly autistic). I don't know if her first family had kids, but I'm guessing they didn't.

She (Jewel) has warmed up to me a lot... and I thought that would be awesome being bird's one person. But I'm starting to realize that maybe I'm wanting more of a 'family' bird... one that the kids could at least hold under supervision.. I can respect that Jewel doesn't want that and don't want to force her into a mold that she can't fit into.

I still plan on working the best I can for Jewels diet and interactions... she deserves our best.

But I'm also opening my mind and heart to the idea that loving her might mean letting her move on when our time with her is up (at the end of Dec).

She's my first foster, and I guess I was sorta hoping she would fit right in... and she still might warm up to all of us.. its only been 1 month and that's like a nanosecond in bird time.

I guess I just wanted to "talk" about it to people who might understand. you know?

Tracy

Tracy,

Don't get down on yourself, you are doing a great thing fostering Jewel. If it is in her best interest to live in another home that is the right and kind thing to do! I do a lot of rescue and have fallen in love with rescue dogs and birds and kept them, I have had some for a LONG time and then rehomed them, and have known with some all along that I wouldn't be the best home for them. Allow yourself to do what is best for Jewel and for your family. You are doing a great thing by fostering her!

 

[Latanville]

yes its ok i think

 

[PerfectlyParrot]

Just the fact that you are considering this shows how much you do love her! The long-term goal is for everyone to be happy. You are giving her a safe and loving environment right now and that should be commended.

 

[waterfaller1]

It's a wonderful thing that you have given Jewel your love and care. She will take that with her when she goes to her forever home

yes its ok i think

Hi, Welcome to The Avenue.

 

[M-Nature]

Just take it one day at a time. I read about a person who had a macaw but was concerned because the macaw was nervous around her children. She rehomed the bird to a wonderful couple who did not have children, but it wasn't too long before the new owners contacted her and said the macaw was crying/grieving all the time. It was heart breaking. To make a long story short, the new owners brought the macaw back to her and the bird was beside herself with joy.

So, think of this as an experiment and see how it goes.