IDK WHAT TO DO SOMEONE HELP ME :(

[APlumpBird]

Good afternoon everybody,

Yesterday my male lovebird passed away, he was at the vet since Sunday evening. He left behind his partner and their 2 kids. So far, my female lovebird has not been calling to him. Nor have I seen her sad. I have her with her kids who are already 4 months old. So they are fully weaned and what not. Although occasionally she gets frustrated with them. I’ve been reading a lot about birds getting sad after the loss of the mate. I just wanted to know what are some signs I got to look out for With her. Since Sunday she’s been sleeping alone. But yesterday I decided she should sleep in the same cage with her 2 kids. Which is big enough for 3 lovebirds. So I put her little hut that they use to sleep in the corner of the cage. She didn’t end up staying in it and decided to stay hanging from one of her toys. Her kids do the same thing btw. I’m just worried for her. Any recommendations? Do I get her a new partner? I feel guilty bringing in another male right away. I really bonded with my little guy and I just feel horrible. But at the same time. I don’t want to lose one due to sadness. Please help me out. Someone ...

 

[sunnysmom]

I'm very sorry for your loss. It sounds like she's doing okay...? I'll tag some lovebird people.

@Zara @fluffypoptarts

 

[Zara]

I´m very sorry for your loss

Don´t house them together. Mum alone, two littles in their own cage. A hen is a danger to begin with, coupled with recent loss/trauma. Bad situation.

You can allow the same out of cage time for them to interact if they want to.

I would wait to bring her a new bird. Do you have a good relationship with her? Will she interact with you? If she does, then new toys, some treats, a lot of TLC for now. Just observe and don´t push. Give her opportunities to interact with her offspring, or play with you, but if she doesn´t want to, then that is ok.

I don´t have concrete answers on how to deal with the flock dynamics after such loss, I dread the day I have to deal with this, especially as I like you have offspring and a tight flock.

I hope she will be ok.

 

[APlumpBird]

Thank you guys for the support and kind words. But to answer your question. Sometimes she does nip at them a little. Almost like she gets territorial. She does have a great relationship with me and my family at home. As of lately, if she sees one of us near the cage. She quickly tries to open the door or like bobs her head up and down like saying “hey notice me and let me out to play!” The thing is that I’m very scared to let her out right now. For one reason is that I used to let her and her mate out. But the reason he died is Bc he got too curious I’m assuming and swallowed metal. So he died for metal toxicity. So what I’m thinking is that I’m going to clip her and the kids wings and let them out gradually again. Once again thank you for the options and advice !

 

[Zara]

So what I’m thinking is that I’m going to clip her and the kids wings and let them out gradually again.

Please don´t do that.
This will have a big impact on her mental wellbeing.. she just lost her mate then her flight ability disappears? Very bad. Confusing and heartbreaking.

Just have a good tidy up, be sure there are no hazardous items around and let her out to play. She seems to be wanting to, so you could let her out and just supervise her to be sure she is not chewing on something she is not supposed to
Letting her out to play one on one with you will help her.

 

[finchly]

I think that, like us, they have to grieve. It takes time.

My cockatiel lost her mate some months back. She was sad and nipped at us, and occasionally yelled for her mate.

When my budgie lost her mate, she stayed in the cage and wouldn't come out. Then she laid eggs and sat on them for a long time. AFter that it seemed like she went back to normal.

I guess it's hard for them to tell us how they feel.

Could you take the hen to a smaller room and supervise her while she's out?

 

[APlumpBird]

Okay, thank you. I appreciate your help a lot. I will most deft not do that then. I will keep you guys updated.@zara

 

[Zara]

I will most deft not do that then.

Thankyou for listening.
I see often we warn people of what can happen with wing clipping, especially after big changes (deaths, new birds, illnesses, new homes) and they clip the bird anyway, then later read the person feeling full of guilt and remorse, but it is too late.

Finchlys tip of allowing flight in a smaller room is a great idea to start with

 

[APlumpBird]

I think that, like us, they have to grieve. It takes time.

My cockatiel lost her mate some months back. She was sad and nipped at us, and occasionally yelled for her mate.

When my budgie lost her mate, she stayed in the cage and wouldn't come out. Then she laid eggs and sat on them for a long time. AFter that it seemed like she went back to normal.

I guess it's hard for them to tell us how they feel.

Could you take the hen to a smaller room and supervise her while she's out?

Yeah I can, I usually play video games with her watching me on my shoulder, or I watch tv or videos on my phone with her. I use to do it a lot with her and my little guy. Both of them. That’s how we were so close. But yeah, sometimes I wish I spoke bird.

 

[APlumpBird]

I'm very sorry for your loss. It sounds like she's doing okay...? I'll tag some lovebird people.

@Zara @fluffypoptarts

Thank you

 

[expressmailtome]

I am sorry for your loss.

 

[APlumpBird]

I am sorry for your loss.

Thank you :/