I miss my pet bird

[elixir]

So, I'm new here. My beloved baby bird passed away nearly six months ago. It's been extremely hard on me to the point where I sometimes feel suicidal. She was my child, I cry everyday because she is not here with me anymore, I don't know what to do about the grief anymore.
I sometimes feel that I should adopt another abandoned or sick bird. But then I feel that my wounds are still fresh and I wouldn't be able to handle the responsibility and do justice to the new pet.
I am at the point wherein if something happens to me that results in me losing my life then I'll welcome it with open arms if it means that I'll get to see my pet bird again.
I know that I'm overreacting but that's how deep my grief is.

 

[sunnysmom]

I am very sorry for your loss. Have you thought about talking to a grief counselor? I would never want to see something bad happen to you and I hope you think about reaching out to someone to help you process your grief. I understand how hard it is to lose a bird. When I lost my beloved Sunny I cried for weeks. Years later, I still miss him. But it's not the same overwelming feeling. So hang in there. When I first lost Sunny I never thought I would have another bird. It somehow felt like a betrayal to him. But then I realized that he would want me to give another bird a good, loving home just like I gave him. I started slow. I fostered for a local rescue, helping birds transition to their new forever homes. Eventually, I became a foster fail and adopted Elvis, the goffin you see in my signature. After that, I also adopted Scooter, cockatiel. And agreed to take Rosie as a long term foster. Due to his age, they didn't want him bouncing from home to home. So, that's my happy little flock. I still foster and work with our local parrot rescue. Hopefully, in time, you'll feel ready for another bird. Until then, perhaps volunteer somewhere?

 

[SumitaSinh]

... sending you loving thoughts

 

[elixir]

I am very sorry for your loss. Have you thought about talking to a grief counselor? I would never want to see something bad happen to you and I hope you think about reaching out to someone to help you process your grief. I understand how hard it is to lose a bird. When I lost my beloved Sunny I cried for weeks. Years later, I still miss him. But it's not the same overwelming feeling. So hang in there. When I first lost Sunny I never thought I would have another bird. It somehow felt like a betrayal to him. But then I realized that he would want me to give another bird a good, loving home just like I gave him. I started slow. I fostered for a local rescue, helping birds transition to their new forever homes. Eventually, I became a foster fail and adopted Elvis, the goffin you see in my signature. After that, I also adopted Scooter, cockatiel. And agreed to take Rosie as a long term foster. Due to his age, they didn't want him bouncing from home to home. So, that's my happy little flock. I still foster and work with our local parrot rescue. Hopefully, in time, you'll feel ready for another bird. Until then, perhaps volunteer somewhere?

Yes, I'm thinking about going to the bird rescue center tomorrow. Thanks for replying. I wish to know that how did you know Elvis was the one bird you wanted to adopt after your previous pet passed away? Like with my baby bird, her eyes seemed familiar to me and she seemed extremely excited to see me when I was at the animal rescue,she sang and screamed to grab my attention so I decided to adopt her. I don't know if I will ever have that sort of soul connection with any other bird. Would appreciate your thoughts on this

 

[Wally&Eva]

When my cat Rajah passed, I literally could not even close my eyes because it would mean a whole day passed without him in my life. I felt the same way, like I didn’t want to live without him. I couldn’t bear to look at the other cats. So your grief is not over reacting.

I will say that I am sure that you provided a loving home and gave him a wonderful life. Something you have the ability to do again, to another baby, when the time is right. So while it feels like no way out, and the grief makes you feel like you might just explode, remember how you can channel that into making a difference in another one’s life. Birds are so misunderstood, from their basic care needs to being underestimated in all ways. So whether it be volunteering, adopting, rescuing, or just allowing yourself all the time you need to sit with your grief, you will find your way back to feeling like yourself again and with new resolve to love another little one in the future. Big hugs, hang in there.

 

[CeciliaZ]

I am so sorry for your loss. I also lost a much-loved bird 5 months ago and I still cry over her loss. I still have a flock of 7 that needs me but she was my heart bird so I understand how you feel. Please speak to a counselor if necessary. No one would want you to harm yourself.

I have lost birds in the past. No bird will ever replace one you lost and I don't believe they are meant to. Each is special. I also suggest going to the rescue. You might find one that makes you smile and rekindle some of those loving, caring and happy feelings you felt before. Take time to grieve your loss, but don't deny yourself the joy and love another bird may bring you. I lost my first tiel almost 13 years ago. It was very hard - but it is only because of him that I have all my other birds. Or maybe consider another type of pet. Just a thought.

Take care of yourself. Many of the members here have been through the grief of losing a bird. We do understand.

 

[MnGuy]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't know how you're feeling, but I have gone through the loss of the first parrot I had as an adult, and the loss my first dog, who I had from my teenage years through all of my 20s.

Losing a pet is so incredibly hard, and there's a lot of support and understanding here. You're not alone. Take care of yourself and seek professional help for your feelings. Take the time you need to grieve the loss, and keep in mind that the experience and knowledge you gained with your first bird could be very valuable to giving another bird a happy life if/when you're ready for it.

As painful as it was to lose my first bird and dog, I now have two other dogs and two other birds that I love just as much. They're different individuals and the relationships are different, but the love is the same.

Take care.

 

[sunnysmom]

Yes, I'm thinking about going to the bird rescue center tomorrow. Thanks for replying. I wish to know that how did you know Elvis was the one bird you wanted to adopt after your previous pet passed away? Like with my baby bird, her eyes seemed familiar to me and she seemed extremely excited to see me when I was at the animal rescue,she sang and screamed to grab my attention so I decided to adopt her. I don't know if I will ever have that sort of soul connection with any other bird. Would appreciate your thoughts on this

It was a different reaction with the two. Sunny loved me the moment he saw me. I can't explain. Sometimes tiels pick their people. Sunny was technically supposed to be my boyfriend's bird but Sunny thought differently- I was his. LOL. When we met Elvis, he actually initially liked my boyfriend better than me but he liked me too. I thought this was fine as I always felt a bit like I had "stolen" my boyfriend's bird from him. Things changed over time though and now Elvis is definitely "mine". He interacts very little with my boyfriend but is my best buddy. I think you will just know when you meet the right bird. Maybe he won't instantly react to you but I think you will feel a connection.

 

[expressmailtome]

I am sorry for your loss.

 

[elixir]

When my cat Rajah passed, I literally could not even close my eyes because it would mean a whole day passed without him in my life. I felt the same way, like I didn’t want to live without him. I couldn’t bear to look at the other cats. So your grief is not over reacting.

I will say that I am sure that you provided a loving home and gave him a wonderful life. Something you have the ability to do again, to another baby, when the time is right. So while it feels like no way out, and the grief makes you feel like you might just explode, remember how you can channel that into making a difference in another one’s life. Birds are so misunderstood, from their basic care needs to being underestimated in all ways. So whether it be volunteering, adopting, rescuing, or just allowing yourself all the time you need to sit with your grief, you will find your way back to feeling like yourself again and with new resolve to love another little one in the future. Big hugs, hang in there.

Thank you for your kind words. Only someone like you who has loved an animal with all their heart would understand.

 

[Kiwi's Dad]

I'm sorry for your loss I understand how it might be difficult to get another bird.

 

[Sarahmoluccan]

I'm so sorry for your loss I've struggled with depression and anxiety and have been suicidal often. I know the death of a beloved pet amplify those feelings. I highly encourage you to find some support in your everyday life. Even if it's through your doctor or a therapist. I know its easier said than done. You're of course more than welcome to lend on this site for support too.

 

[LexBirds]

I am so sorry for your loss,

 

[Dartman]

I lost Nerd bird my Maxi Pionus best friend after 31 years growing up together and it was devastating to me, and my family. My little sister wanted me to have another Nerd and found me Lurch, a very used and mad at the world Maxi. We needed each other, I needed another feathered friend, and he needed a new home that would let him be who he was and slowly let him accept a new favorite person to love again. I wasn't ready but he kept me busy dodging bites and slowly earning his trust. It was so worth it at the end as he was happy and chased me around the house like a feathered puppy.
He certainly wasn't Nerd who pretty much trusted me unconditionally, he was Lurch who was cranky and quick to bite but learned to trust again.
When you're ready the right bird will come to you. It won't be a replacement for your old friend, it will be a whole new little soul with his own new personality that will love you in his own way and you will back

 

[Zara]

I´m truly sorry for your loss.

I wish I could say something that would help you, or make you feel better but I just don´t know what. I do hope that you will stick around the Avenue here, and reach out to us when you need to. There are so many of us that have lost our beloved companions, that have experienced that same grief, that have lived it before, and there´s usually always someone online here to talk to.

I am at the point wherein if something happens to me that results in me losing my life then I'll welcome it with open arms if it means that I'll get to see my pet bird again.
I know that I'm overreacting but that's how deep my grief is.

I get it. I am not a suicidal person. But last year I lost my dog Jacob, and he was my world. It was just awful, still is. A couple of months later my uncle died. I flew home to the UK to read a poem at his service and on the return home, our flight was at low capacity, only 40 or so folks. Mid flight a guy had what I´m assuming was some sort of mental breakdown, shouting that they were after him and going to kill him, trying to open the doors screaming to let him off the plane, he proceeded to stagger up the plane isle begging everyone pleading with such fear, before screaming that we´re all going to die while laying on the floor. It was quite a frightening thing to experience. The plane was diverted and as we decended for landing, he got up and again was screaming that we´re all going to die and trying to open the doors, at this point the staff were seated for landing. And in those minutes, I remember thinking, if the worst happens, he´ll be there for me, I´ll get to see him again. And I felt better. I thought I was going to die, and thinking that I could be reunited with my boy certainly changed how I felt about that.
So I really do understand.

I feel that my wounds are still fresh and I wouldn't be able to handle the responsibility and do justice to the new pet.

When I was dating my ex, I lost a baby. And his idea to try move forward was to buy a puppy. A little Frenchie, Tyson. Cute little guy. Had him little over a year when he suddenly died. I ran to the vet up the road but he died in my arms on the way. Needless to say, I was devastated. He insisted we buy another dog to keep his dog company, I kept pushing back, until I reluctantly went with him to buy Jacob. I had thought it was too soon for me. But honestly, looking back now, Jacob was one of the best things to happen in my life, and had I gone with my gut and not brought him home, I would have missed out on all of it, his wonderful life, the times he comforted me, the walks, the snuggles, the companionship.

There´s no right or wrong, but I will say, just take each day as it comes and see how you feel, maybe you´ll meet a bird and in your heart, you will know it´s meant to be.

Please do reach out to us here, if you ever want to talk, we know that they are more than just a pet, just a dog, just a bird.
They are our family.

 

[elixir]

Thank you for your kind words. I cried a little reading them. So,yesterday I went to the bird rescue center and I brought home a baby pigeon to foster till he gets old enough to fly. It made me feel slightly better but I do feel that I have a lot more healing to do before I can think about getting another pet bird or animal.
I will continue to donate time, money and resources to wildlife rescue centers nearby for the time being.
I also am dialing up my self care and will speak to a therapist soon.

 

[Tyrion]

Im so sorry for your loss

 

[Keetie!]

I too am so sorry for your loss. I go back and forth with wanting a new feathered baby and then I think of my Blueberry. I still tear up when I think that we only had only 5 years and eight months together...but...I am so grateful that God gave me that much time with this incredible budgie. I am in a different head space right now, but I will know when the time is right. I think you will know also.

I had to stop feeling guilty for not getting another budgie real soon. I keep telling myself that if I should be in charge of another, that budgie will find me. I wish you hugs!

 

[my parrott]

I'm sorry for your loss I understand how it might be difficult to get another bird.

Sorry for your loss I lost my parrottlet pricess last Friday and iv cried everyday