Grieving Eckie

[Aggie]

We had to put our family dog down 3 days ago. Our 6yr male eckie was best buddies with him.

After much consultation with vets and experienced bird owners we allowed him to be present.

He appears fine only I know him too well. He's actually not eating and not playing while we are not home. Luckily we are only out a couple hours a day. Once home he's extra engaging in all he likes too do and even a bit clingy.

First day he was calling the dog and swearing immediately after. Then he was yelling his name and saying 'he's ok'.

Today he kept screaming 'Get him' which we use to say to the dog to get him to chase someone for fun etc. Well I told him he's not here sweetie to get anyone and he said 'Get me' then started barking like a dog.

Like I get he has a void to fill but it's making me really sad at the same time. I just end up giving him something else to do to destract him from making it about the dog.

I would really like to hear how others have helped their eckies in particular through grief and loss. I just want to make sure we are supporting him as much as possible. We are all a mess and not really thinking properly atm.

Any advice greatly appreciated.

 

[Icey]

I have no experience with eckies but sending big hugs to you for your loss.

 

[Pixiebeak]

Parrots are amazing in their social connections.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
He us processing it and so clearly has his pup on his mind.

Just keep up with extra attention and explaining he is gone.

My green cheek lost her best friend 4 years ago and still says her name. I tried ignoring it thinking it would drop from her memory. But she would get upset. So now I go ahead and say her friends name back to her and share memories. That really calms her down and it seems like she just wants to talk about her friend sometimes. She really grieved as well and stopped eating and had me at the vet so worried for her.

 

[macawpower58]

My Macaw had my German Shepherd Quanto sleep on the floor, next to his cage, for 14 years.
He always had that dog's quiet company for the hours I was away at work.
Chaos learned to bark, and even learned to howl like my dog did.
Quanto passed from old age at about 16. Chaos saw us carry my old boy out in a blanket. He had passed quietly during the night.
I guessing he was aware of his passing, but who really knows.
For a few days he barked and howled softly to himself.
Then he stopped.
He's never made either sound since.
Even though my bird really never showed signs of mourning, I know he missed that quiet presence.
Time is what helps.

 

[Clueless]

So sorry. They do take things hard.

 

[Aggie]

Parrots are amazing in their social connections.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
He us processing it and so clearly has his pup on his mind.

Just keep up with extra attention and explaining he is gone.

My green cheek lost her best friend 4 years ago and still says her name. I tried ignoring it thinking it would drop from her memory. But she would get upset. So now I go ahead and say her friends name back to her and share memories. That really calms her down and it seems like she just wants to talk about her friend sometimes. She really grieved as well and stopped eating and had me at the vet so worried for her.

Thank you for your reply. TBH I feel mine will be calling for his best mate forever. But tbh hearing you mention talking about them made it easier I wondered th8s myself.... just do hard to do and not burst into years which is very concerning for the eckie.

I try not anthropomorphize his emotions but it's really so hard. He us clearly grieving and I zero experience with parrots and grief. Most AV have no idea.

One thing for sure though is being all together we are all that bit better.

 

[Aggie]

My Macaw had my German Shepherd Quanto sleep on the floor, next to his cage, for 14 years.
He always had that dog's quiet company for the hours I was away at work.
Chaos learned to bark, and even learned to howl like my dog did.
Quanto passed from old age at about 16. Chaos saw us carry my old boy out in a blanket. He had passed quietly during the night.
I guessing he was aware of his passing, but who really knows.
For a few days he barked and howled softly to himself.
Then he stopped.
He's never made either sound since.
Even though my bird really never showed signs of mourning, I know he missed that quiet presence.
Time is what helps.

Thank you for your reply. I wouldn't have even thought about the quiet dog presence tbh. We really under estimate our feather friends.

Hopefully time helps. He was such a special boy to us all that even the eckie had the bestest friend.

 

[Clueless]

Thanks to the people here, I knew to bring MC's body home so that Secret could understand he wasn't with us any longer.

Hubby saw the reaction Secret had. Hubby didn't expect that reaction either. Heart breaking.