Should I get it? or no?

[Mizzely]

Of course I have researched and studied about this parrot. and the "special diet", I don't think it's that special, same as healthy human need fruit and vegetables beside of carbs.

Regarding why I choose this breed and why I want to have it, its a personal choice and its same as asking "why you love this guy/girl and want to marry him/her?"

Looks like I can not gain any valuable info on this forums, and it became a waste for me to post the actual images of the bird.

Thank you guys for all those welcoming personal attack questions without having owned an eclectus before.

There is nothing we can tell you based off of a picture. People were asking questions to get the "big picture" so they COULD give you advice. That's not an attack. That's requesting more information that is relevant to the question you asked.

If you want advice based only on that photo: it's an unweaned eclectus male parrot and needs more time with it's parents before you take it home.

 

[Aggie]

Maybe he’ll at least read here. Parrots are a lifestyle not a piece of decor like a lamp or vase....
She says, typing with middle finger due to major parrot bites on others!

@finchly You have labled it exactly....its a lifestyle choice! Our life revolves around our little guy and we wouldn't have it any other way. If you told us that prior to having one, we would think you're crazy...and i just picked up my new pakobird. Lol

@ec0038 Honestly everyone wants the best for you and your future bird. Until you have one and go through particular motions its hard to understand. It can be so hard and frustrating at times. Everyone is just trying to help by identifying the major issues with this particular breed.

When i first researched i did think that would not be us in regards to some of the issues....but one day it was us. This forum warned me of that. It then gave me valuable advice to over come some issues. Some advice was hard to take, some straight to point and some offended me. But end of day. You dont have to take the advice or even reply to any of the people that post to your question. People just mean well.

 

[janicedyh]

This just makes me sad and I have to admit, a little angry. A person comes here asking for advice and suggestions and leaves in a huff when they don't get what they want to hear. They wanted to hear something like...awww how cute, you better get that baby NOW and of course you can hand feed an unweaned Eclectus, everything will be hunky dorey. I think all the responses were kind and thoughtful and filled with concern that someone was biting off more than they could chew and biting their tongues or in this case...typing fingers.

 

[Jas]

I did a lot of research before I decided on conures and bringing them home and I have previous bird experience with budgies. But that research never actually gave the realisation of how demanding they are, not just financial resources but love, time, energy, having to change your whole home and routine. Learning to accept who they are and knowing what triggers them, makes them happy, making tons of sacrifices, putting up with biting, screaming, moods, total destruction of books, curtains etc. the emotional and mental complexity of birds gets washed away in many articles, it doesn't get brought up.

Like hey, you now have an animal that's intelligent as you with no other companion, high nutritional needs, very complex emotions, scarce specialist vets, and a life span almost longer than yours with a fog horn and power tools for a face! Good luck!!

The truth, birds aren't pets! They are more than that, they are wild animals that are cohabiting with their strange 'flock', a family.

People aren't targeting or being rude! You can read all the baby books in the world but soon as you have one you realise what you have gotten yourself into, which can be bad in some cases. Same with birds, it's them who are the ones to suffer, get passed from home to home (same with a child getting passed into foster care).

There's a wealth of information here and people with knowledge and first hand experience ask them questions, get to know problems and gather more information. It's them same thing you do when you have a kid, talk to parents who have them, gain ideas and experiences. Making life easier and gives you an idea.

 

[Fia Baby]

Personally, I'd find the responses here off-putting as well. Someone comes here asking a question, and is clearly excited about the potential, and is made to feel that they have to defend themselves. There are certainly better ways to respond that could actually start a dialog.

 

[Mizzely]

Personally, I'd find the responses here off-putting as well. Someone comes here asking a question, and is clearly excited about the potential, and is made to feel that they have to defend themselves. There are certainly better ways to respond that could actually start a dialog.

They asked for advice based on the photo and gave no additional details about themself or the situation .Without knowing what the asker knows already about birds, it's very difficult to provide useful information. There is nothing in the original post to suggest that the asker knows anything about birds, so we have to start from the beginning.


How would you start a similar conversation?

Can you give me advice based on this photo?

 

[Erikalynnha]

@Fia Baby

I'm sorry I'm alittle confused. Were there comments that got deleted? Because all the comments I seen after OP posted we're quite polite. It is hard to "read feelings" without seeing or hearing someones voice. I did not feel like anyone was attacking OP and didn't get offended until OPs second post which I found quite rude after all the advice. I'm sorry they got offended from people telling them to do more research. Even the smartest people in the world continue to learn. The responses that were received I think create open dialogue and are indeed useful questions to ask oneself before making any big decisions on buying or adopting a bird.

 

[Fia Baby]

I think you start with commenting on the bird - it looks well-taken care of, it's cute, it reminds you of your own bird when it was a baby... - something positive that acknowledges the excitement of the other person. That's the key point - can you first acknowledge the feelings of the other person? If you want someone to listen to you, and to ask you questions in return, there has to be some acknowledgement to begin with. Don't start with advice or a barrage of questions, start with acknowledgement. I get that everyone here cares about birds - that's why starting an actual dialog is important.

The engine? Silly, but it's the same thing, if you need a model: that's a really clean looking engine, it must be new or rarely driven, wish mine looked that clean...

 

[Jas]

I 100% get where you are coming from but when you're concerned about the bird it doesn't first spring to mind.

It's hard to read emotion through text and depending on what mood people are in they may take it negatively anyway.

Reading back, people aren't saying don't get the bird. They're asking do you know what you are getting into etc. which isn't offensive, maybe overbearing but not cruel or rude.

 

[Fia Baby]

I know it's not the most natural 1st response, and that no rudeness was intended. I know the intentions are good. It's just a different point of departure, leading to the same destination.

 

[Erikalynnha]

I get it to. Its a perfect example of how people react two different emotions. Some people will see this comment thread and think wow people are so rude others like myself read these comments and thought everyone was being helpful. There are many ways to start a dialogue or conversation. I've always been a person who doesn't get easily offended I don't care if you start a conversation with me on a positive note as long as I get helpful advice. You can tell me I'm an idiot and I'd be like all man I need to work on that but I know not everyone can handle that type of criticism. Infact when I meet new people I have a habit of not introducing myself (they always have to ask later or have someone else introduce us) and acting like I've known a person all my life. Some people are put off by that others love it. Again its just how people react to any given situation. This was not OPs cup of tea doesn't mean anyone is in the wrong.

 

[danadear]

I think you start with commenting on the bird - it looks well-taken care of, it's cute, it reminds you of your own bird when it was a baby... - something positive that acknowledges the excitement of the other person. That's the key point - can you first acknowledge the feelings of the other person? If you want someone to listen to you, and to ask you questions in return, there has to be some acknowledgement to begin with. Don't start with advice or a barrage of questions, start with acknowledgement. I get that everyone here cares about birds - that's why starting an actual dialog is important.

The engine? Silly, but it's the same thing, if you need a model: that's a really clean looking engine, it must be new or rarely driven, wish mine looked that clean...

I agree. And I think until you verify you shouldn't assume someone knows nothing about birds. English may not be the dominant language too which makes things even less clear. Some of the comments came across as arrogant and condescending to me and nobody likes that. I understand the statistics and it's hard to see people getting birds that maybe shouldn't but I think you have to be careful. If you want this forum to be effective and help birds you have to keep people here that need the help the most. But I know it's hard to do.

ETA if this person really is ignorant about birds and needs help she's not going to get it now because she left after feeling unwelcome. Who suffers? The bird of course.

 

[Fia Baby]

Wow! This turned into an incredibly positive conversation. Social media can be an incredibly difficult medium in which to interact.

 

[TikiMyn]

Personally, I'd find the responses here off-putting as well. Someone comes here asking a question, and is clearly excited about the potential, and is made to feel that they have to defend themselves. There are certainly better ways to respond that could actually start a dialog.

I’m sorry but I don’t agree. All we did was ask questions, and in a Nice way in my view. Nothing here was offensive in any way. If you want advice to wether or not to buy a baby eclectus, we Will need a lot more then just a picture. Anyone can make an account here and ask that question. They may not known anything about parrots. I am never going to say o go ahead get that bird, when I don’t know anything about that person. If that person gets so angry about a few questions, then to me that says they haven’t done proper research. If you live with parrots I think you constantly have to question yourself, am I Providing them with a good diet, enough enrichment and so on, and you Will have to adapt as new research is done. Anyway that’s what I think.

 

[Lodah]

I"m sorry... I must be in the wrong forum! Does it say that AA is dedicated to giving you that warm, cuddly feeling or is it a place that you seek so as to enrich the life of your parrot? Sorry... must be on the wrong planet also!

 

[finchly]

I"m sorry... I must be in the wrong forum! Does it say that AA is dedicated to giving you that warm, cuddly feeling or is it a place that you seek so as to enrich the life of your parrot? Sorry... must be on the wrong planet also!

Well.....we knew that about you! ​

 

[Sylvester]

I didn't find the comments offensive but they were a little bit overwhelming. It came across like an interrogation. I almost expected one person to ask "And just where were you last night at ten pm?"

 

[expressmailtome]

I'm sorry I'm alittle confused. Were there comments that got deleted?

Nothing was deleted from this thread.

 

[HolliDaze]

The diet was special for that species, no one was talking about a normal Parrot diet. I believe they think that parrots are like dogs- if you know the care for one breed, you can care for them all. One may bark more or be more energetic, but they all have the same care. That always makes me nervous when people say breeds instead of species.

 

[janicedyh]

I didn't find any negative post prior to them leaving in a huff. Yes, most of us were thinking of the birds welfare and not making an effort to coddle the poster but just the same, we were not being rude either (which I can't say about the poster). If someone is dead set on getting a specific bird, there is nothing we can do to persuade them that it might not be in their or the birds interest if that person came not wanting to really learn and only wanted to post a picture and say look at this, I can get it, isn't it cute. If someone comes here wanting real info from people with experience and a "REAL" desire to learn they would not have taken offence and would have been thankful for the people who care enough to keep one more bird from being a statistic. Bottom line, a person wanted a bird, did not like others saying it might not be wise to get said bird, threw a tantrum and left