- Joined
- 3/24/14
- Messages
- 96
This last Thursday, my green cheek conure, Remmy, passed. He had sustained a serious head injury a few months back resulting in neurological damage and, and while he was recovering, it seems he re-agitated the situation, and died from what appeared to be a seizure of some kind.
I am at a loss. I got eight years with him. Eight years to love him, to learn from him, to grow with him...I grew up with animals, since the time I was 3 I have been dealing with loss. I've gotten pretty good at it but this...It doesn't even feel real. I feel numb. My baby is gone. My ornery, cuddly, particular, energetic, beautiful, incredible, life-changing, sweet-as-honey, baby, is gone.
I've never been particularly religious but, I'm having trouble believing such a bright, fiery soul could just, blink out of existence. He taught me more about this world than any human could. He came into my life when I was in a really, really dark place. When I had no will to live, he gave me a reason to keep clinging to life. When I found the strength to live for myself again, he taught me the joy in that.
I'm at a loss. I feel empty and broken. I keep expecting to hear him talking, trying to get my attention. He was so special. He was very attached to me, and really didn't care for other people, yet he broke so many barriers. My brother had never had good relationships with birds. He's a big guy with a deep voice and presence, and most birds just did not want to be around him, but something about Rem made him work at it. When we were both living at home together, he would spend time every day trying to reach Remmy. Eventually, he would get so excited to see my brother, bobbing his head, making kissy noises... My best friend who was terrified of all birds saw my relationship with him and is not the loving, amazing person to an Indian ringneck.
I bled from him more times than I can count. When He turned one, there was about a year of being bit to hell every day. There were times back then where I would cry and just wonder how in the world I could get through to him. I never stopped trying though, and I know he knew that. He knew I never turned my back to him.
I'm sorry this is such a rant. I'm trying to make his death feel like a real thing. I'm having him cremated, and hopefully when I get his ashes back, that will help, but right now I'm struggling to process any of this.
My baby is gone.
And it hurts more than I can describe. I'm trying to trust that there is peace in death, and that I gave him everything I could. That he enjoyed his life.
Sleep peacefully baby. Eat all the fruit your heart desires. Pick out the safflower seeds and ignore your pellets. There will always be a piece of my heart reserved for you.
I am at a loss. I got eight years with him. Eight years to love him, to learn from him, to grow with him...I grew up with animals, since the time I was 3 I have been dealing with loss. I've gotten pretty good at it but this...It doesn't even feel real. I feel numb. My baby is gone. My ornery, cuddly, particular, energetic, beautiful, incredible, life-changing, sweet-as-honey, baby, is gone.
I've never been particularly religious but, I'm having trouble believing such a bright, fiery soul could just, blink out of existence. He taught me more about this world than any human could. He came into my life when I was in a really, really dark place. When I had no will to live, he gave me a reason to keep clinging to life. When I found the strength to live for myself again, he taught me the joy in that.
I'm at a loss. I feel empty and broken. I keep expecting to hear him talking, trying to get my attention. He was so special. He was very attached to me, and really didn't care for other people, yet he broke so many barriers. My brother had never had good relationships with birds. He's a big guy with a deep voice and presence, and most birds just did not want to be around him, but something about Rem made him work at it. When we were both living at home together, he would spend time every day trying to reach Remmy. Eventually, he would get so excited to see my brother, bobbing his head, making kissy noises... My best friend who was terrified of all birds saw my relationship with him and is not the loving, amazing person to an Indian ringneck.
I bled from him more times than I can count. When He turned one, there was about a year of being bit to hell every day. There were times back then where I would cry and just wonder how in the world I could get through to him. I never stopped trying though, and I know he knew that. He knew I never turned my back to him.
I'm sorry this is such a rant. I'm trying to make his death feel like a real thing. I'm having him cremated, and hopefully when I get his ashes back, that will help, but right now I'm struggling to process any of this.
My baby is gone.
And it hurts more than I can describe. I'm trying to trust that there is peace in death, and that I gave him everything I could. That he enjoyed his life.
Sleep peacefully baby. Eat all the fruit your heart desires. Pick out the safflower seeds and ignore your pellets. There will always be a piece of my heart reserved for you.
