Heather F
Rollerblading along the road
Yesterday I defended my hooman!
I was minding my own business foraging on the floor for crumbs from the nutri-berry I had eaten earlier when I saw my hooman putting on her big puffy outer things so I knew she was going to go into the Outside Place. And then all of a sudden I saw the DANGER!
There was a big black MONSTER trying to EAT her FOOT!! And there were EVIL SNAKES dangling off of the MONSTER!!! She had her hands on the monster, clearly trying to defend herself from it and keep it from eating her foot. But her foot kept getting sucked farther and farther into it. It was TERRIBLE!!!!!
It was a GREAT BIG MONSTER bigger than me but I knew what I had to do. I love my hooman and I must defend her from such an obvious danger regardless of risk to my own life and limb. I rushed forward and ATTACKED that monster and the EVIL SNAKES dangling from it that the hooman was now trying to wrestle with now that her foot was fully engulfed in the creature's maw.
I am not ashamed to say that I nipped at my hooman's fingers. You know how foolish the poor hoomans are and I could not think of any other way to let her know to take her hands away from the EVIL SNAKES and let me kill them for her. I puffed myself up as big as I could and let out my fiercest war challenge. "SNURFLESNURFLESNIFF!" I cried! Every time my silly hooman tried to get her hands close to the EVIL SNAKES I warned her off. This is a job for fierce brave birds, not silly foolish hoomans!
By this point my other hooman who was not getting her puffy outer things on had come to check on the commotion. She asked me what was going on as if it wasn't OBVIOUS that a HORRIBLE FOOT EATING SNAKE MONSTER was attacking her fellow hooman. I heard her telling the other one something about "just tie them once you get out the door." That sounded like a reasonable plan. Perhaps in the Outside Place the EVIL SNAKES could be corralled and tied up and left to perish from exposure. So I did not object too strenuously when the hooman opened the door to the Hall That Leads To The Outside Place, although she did not seem to understand that I wished to accompany her to make sure that the MONSTER was properly vanquished. She somehow managed to get out and close the door while I was momentarily distracted by something the other hooman was doing. That was my only failure in my mission. But I did not hear any dying noises from my hooman so maybe she was able to drag the HORRIBLE FOOT EATING SNAKE MONSTER away as planned. Still I kept up a fierce guard in front of the door for a time to defend my remaining hooman from trying to go near it in case the monster was lying in wait.
And the hooman returned a while later, apparently unharmed, when I was back in my house getting ready for bedtime, and she even still had her feet and all of her fingers. So I can confidently say that I achieved my objective of saving her.
Aren't I a BRAVE bird???
Love Frodo
I was minding my own business foraging on the floor for crumbs from the nutri-berry I had eaten earlier when I saw my hooman putting on her big puffy outer things so I knew she was going to go into the Outside Place. And then all of a sudden I saw the DANGER!
There was a big black MONSTER trying to EAT her FOOT!! And there were EVIL SNAKES dangling off of the MONSTER!!! She had her hands on the monster, clearly trying to defend herself from it and keep it from eating her foot. But her foot kept getting sucked farther and farther into it. It was TERRIBLE!!!!!
It was a GREAT BIG MONSTER bigger than me but I knew what I had to do. I love my hooman and I must defend her from such an obvious danger regardless of risk to my own life and limb. I rushed forward and ATTACKED that monster and the EVIL SNAKES dangling from it that the hooman was now trying to wrestle with now that her foot was fully engulfed in the creature's maw.
I am not ashamed to say that I nipped at my hooman's fingers. You know how foolish the poor hoomans are and I could not think of any other way to let her know to take her hands away from the EVIL SNAKES and let me kill them for her. I puffed myself up as big as I could and let out my fiercest war challenge. "SNURFLESNURFLESNIFF!" I cried! Every time my silly hooman tried to get her hands close to the EVIL SNAKES I warned her off. This is a job for fierce brave birds, not silly foolish hoomans!
By this point my other hooman who was not getting her puffy outer things on had come to check on the commotion. She asked me what was going on as if it wasn't OBVIOUS that a HORRIBLE FOOT EATING SNAKE MONSTER was attacking her fellow hooman. I heard her telling the other one something about "just tie them once you get out the door." That sounded like a reasonable plan. Perhaps in the Outside Place the EVIL SNAKES could be corralled and tied up and left to perish from exposure. So I did not object too strenuously when the hooman opened the door to the Hall That Leads To The Outside Place, although she did not seem to understand that I wished to accompany her to make sure that the MONSTER was properly vanquished. She somehow managed to get out and close the door while I was momentarily distracted by something the other hooman was doing. That was my only failure in my mission. But I did not hear any dying noises from my hooman so maybe she was able to drag the HORRIBLE FOOT EATING SNAKE MONSTER away as planned. Still I kept up a fierce guard in front of the door for a time to defend my remaining hooman from trying to go near it in case the monster was lying in wait.
And the hooman returned a while later, apparently unharmed, when I was back in my house getting ready for bedtime, and she even still had her feet and all of her fingers. So I can confidently say that I achieved my objective of saving her.
Aren't I a BRAVE bird???
Love Frodo
(and of course I can relate)
Happy 
Snow 
and Grumbles 
