I am truly sorry. My current dog (I inherited from my daughter who wanted a puppy) Lucky is my sweetheart. When I got sick and laid in bed for three years, he sat next to me the whole time. He's 10 now and they live sometimes to 16. He has stoically accepted and agreed to never hurt the chickens I raise or even to chase them, he knows to tippy toe when he goes outside so his feet don't get dirty and stays on the concrete and only goes where he is supposed to. That took 10 years! Now I've got a dog who knows my mind. If he left me I would be more devastated than one of my children dying as he's been with me longer than any other pet (he's our first dog). It took me a year of not going to the back yard where Oko our leghorn was killed by a possum. I still can't go to that spot so it is overgrown and can't look in that corner.
I can understand your pain (not exactly as I'm not in your body-that would be weird) but I can empathize and sympathize and say I'm so sorry. There will never be another to take the place of a lost pet but as time goes by this is one I know can get better. I believe he is in doggy heaven. Much support and love coming your way.
