... I've tried to write this post a few times. I think I'm still in disbelief.
On July 18th, in the early morning hours, Buckbeak passed away.
In my last update, we took him for yet another vet visit, but with a new vet. He got blood work, yet another x-ray and an abraxis chemistry reading... When she listened to his hear and chest she heard a murmur and also a weird clicking sound... In the x-ray, they saw what looked like an air pocket - they weren't sure if it was from him sucking in air from panting or if it was causing the panting. They attempted to do a cardio graphic reading of his heart, but they did not get a clear picture. They gave us four new medications, three of which needed to be taken twice a day by syringe. By the end of this vet visit, he was exhausted - it was the first time I had seen him get so clumsy from breathing heavy. I was about to pick up his medications and leave when I noticed a little blood in his stool, so I talk to the vet again and she said that a little bit of blood in his stool was normal after swabbing his vent, but she said I was welcome to wait in the waiting room before leaving (since I live an hour away). I ended up sitting in the waiting room for two hours waiting for his stool to be clear and for the sedation to wear off in order to ensure Buckbeak was okay. Then we finally drove home.
The first day home, after only two doses of medication, he seemed to be doing so much better. The panting stopped for about a 24 hour period. (I was even planning on waiting to write an update post here on the forum announcing how he was better). But then the panting came back and it never went away after that. We gave him his medications for the full prescribed 10 days and didn't see any improvement. The blood work had revealed that his white blood count had been low, meaning it was likely a tumor but they could not identify where based on the x-rays. By this point he had stopped singing - he only vocalized to fweep when he was upset about one of us leaving the room. He had stopped eating his chop and his favorite sweet potato mash too - he only really ate pellets and millet. By the very end of his life, I ended up having to hand feed him his pellets. There was talk about trying to get him a CT-scan, which, even with the CareCredit, would have completely depleted our savings at this time (I finally start work again in September), but we were trying to pull the money together; then I consulted with my primary vet, and she said that, one, the CT-scan and anesthesia would likely of killed Buckbeak given his condition and, two, it would likely only confirm what we already knew... With her advice, we decided the best thing to do was to make Buckbeak as comfortable as possible.
For the last week and a half of his life, Buckbeak only wanted to be with us. He insisted on sitting on one of our shoulders at any given time. Whenever one of us had to put him down for a minute to go to the bathroom or whatever (or to put him in his cage for five minutes for a water break), he always vocalized his protest. He would even fly (despite the fact that we tried to discouraged him from flying at this point) to the computer chair or the sofa and wait for us to come back to sit with him. When he was on our shoulder, he would nuzzle again our neck and press his beak behind our ear and I would rub his soft feathers with my cheek. I can't help but think that he knew he didn't have much more time, and all he wanted to do was express his love for us and to just be with us and seek comfort for us.
My fiance and I were both up very late (I'm not normally a night owl, but I have not slept very well for the past month). The birds were both in their cages and covered and fast asleep when we heard a flutter and thunk. We check on Buckbeak, and he was on the bottom of the cage, panting. I think my fiance and I both knew it was going to be soon... So we took him out and sat with him on the sofa.
Buckbeak spent his last moments in his favorite spot - on my fiance's shoulder. When he was took weak to perch by himself, I held him. He died in my hand while my fiance whistled to him.
We stayed up most of the night crying. The next morning we took him to get him cremated. We want to be able to keep him close, no matter where we go.
Fly free, little hippogriff bird. You taught me so much about trust and love - you changed my life with your love. You taught me what it means to be a part of a flock. I will miss you and your beautiful songs. We love you so much, Buckbeak. We will be holding you close in our heart - always.
On July 18th, in the early morning hours, Buckbeak passed away.
In my last update, we took him for yet another vet visit, but with a new vet. He got blood work, yet another x-ray and an abraxis chemistry reading... When she listened to his hear and chest she heard a murmur and also a weird clicking sound... In the x-ray, they saw what looked like an air pocket - they weren't sure if it was from him sucking in air from panting or if it was causing the panting. They attempted to do a cardio graphic reading of his heart, but they did not get a clear picture. They gave us four new medications, three of which needed to be taken twice a day by syringe. By the end of this vet visit, he was exhausted - it was the first time I had seen him get so clumsy from breathing heavy. I was about to pick up his medications and leave when I noticed a little blood in his stool, so I talk to the vet again and she said that a little bit of blood in his stool was normal after swabbing his vent, but she said I was welcome to wait in the waiting room before leaving (since I live an hour away). I ended up sitting in the waiting room for two hours waiting for his stool to be clear and for the sedation to wear off in order to ensure Buckbeak was okay. Then we finally drove home.
The first day home, after only two doses of medication, he seemed to be doing so much better. The panting stopped for about a 24 hour period. (I was even planning on waiting to write an update post here on the forum announcing how he was better). But then the panting came back and it never went away after that. We gave him his medications for the full prescribed 10 days and didn't see any improvement. The blood work had revealed that his white blood count had been low, meaning it was likely a tumor but they could not identify where based on the x-rays. By this point he had stopped singing - he only vocalized to fweep when he was upset about one of us leaving the room. He had stopped eating his chop and his favorite sweet potato mash too - he only really ate pellets and millet. By the very end of his life, I ended up having to hand feed him his pellets. There was talk about trying to get him a CT-scan, which, even with the CareCredit, would have completely depleted our savings at this time (I finally start work again in September), but we were trying to pull the money together; then I consulted with my primary vet, and she said that, one, the CT-scan and anesthesia would likely of killed Buckbeak given his condition and, two, it would likely only confirm what we already knew... With her advice, we decided the best thing to do was to make Buckbeak as comfortable as possible.
For the last week and a half of his life, Buckbeak only wanted to be with us. He insisted on sitting on one of our shoulders at any given time. Whenever one of us had to put him down for a minute to go to the bathroom or whatever (or to put him in his cage for five minutes for a water break), he always vocalized his protest. He would even fly (despite the fact that we tried to discouraged him from flying at this point) to the computer chair or the sofa and wait for us to come back to sit with him. When he was on our shoulder, he would nuzzle again our neck and press his beak behind our ear and I would rub his soft feathers with my cheek. I can't help but think that he knew he didn't have much more time, and all he wanted to do was express his love for us and to just be with us and seek comfort for us.
My fiance and I were both up very late (I'm not normally a night owl, but I have not slept very well for the past month). The birds were both in their cages and covered and fast asleep when we heard a flutter and thunk. We check on Buckbeak, and he was on the bottom of the cage, panting. I think my fiance and I both knew it was going to be soon... So we took him out and sat with him on the sofa.
Buckbeak spent his last moments in his favorite spot - on my fiance's shoulder. When he was took weak to perch by himself, I held him. He died in my hand while my fiance whistled to him.
We stayed up most of the night crying. The next morning we took him to get him cremated. We want to be able to keep him close, no matter where we go.
Fly free, little hippogriff bird. You taught me so much about trust and love - you changed my life with your love. You taught me what it means to be a part of a flock. I will miss you and your beautiful songs. We love you so much, Buckbeak. We will be holding you close in our heart - always.
You did so much for him and made his last moments as good as any bird could wish for. My heart hurts for you because I know all to well the pain of loss that you are feeling. 
