Don't get a parrot

[Dartman]

I got Nerd, my first Maxi Pionus, and his brother Ferd in 78. As far as I know they were new to the pet trade at that point and wild caught. Ferd was big and calm and very gentle but loved his brother Nerd best, and Nerd loved him back. Unfortunately Ferd got something a few years or so after I got them. He was fine in the morning, sick in the afternoon, and dead by 8pm that night
Nerd was mourning and called for him a while, then realized he was stuck with me so we started to become friends. He eventually blossomed after I moved into my own house and could live out in the living area watching and interacting with me and everyone. He kept doing more, seemed very happy, and never tried to fly away or anything, though he did have bad flight feathers in one wing and knew he couldn't fly well.
He would play and rough house with me, hang out beside me and get scritches and treats, look at me and just go ERK! with happy eyes to say all was right with his world. So he was happy with his life and lived with me for 31 years after probably being in the jungle where he was from with his brother.
So they can form a bond like any other creature can when shown enough kindness and attention and love and return it. He never spoke but I understood what he was trying to communicate with his noises and he knew his name and what I was saying to him.
I'm sure not all parrots will end up like that but he and I certainly were family members and flock-mates till the end so it can happen. Once they are stuck with us we owe it to them to do the best we can for them and with luck they'll decide we are worthy and become our friends.

 

[RocketBo]

Comparing hawks to parrots is like comparing sheep to wolf. Hawks are not social and do not need the stimuli parrots need. For example, a hawk that lives in and enclosed mew with one window by itself and has unlimited supply of quality meat is a very happy hawk. A parrot by itself in a cage with unlimited supply of food is still likely to be a sad parrot.

There are also two types of imprinting: the parental one that occurs when the bird open its eyes, and the sexual one that happens when its a youngster, somewhere between fledging and puberty. So a parent raised bird can still be sexually imprinted to human if it grows up among humans.

 

[HazelBird029]

This stunned me a little. I like how she pointed out how underestimated parrots are, emotionally and all that, and to respect them more, but it's almost like she's preaching and dissing parrot owners in general. I know some wonderful people on AA who really do know how to care for and love parrots.
However, this could be a good warning for some. I've heard of so many people who've purchased parrots on a whim because 'they're pretty' or whatever... sure enough, half those parrots end up on craigslist or in a rescue.
This actually could be helpful for someone who's training a bird... and stuff..
Overall, I didn't like it, but I didn't dislike it. It was... interesting.

 

[Wolf]

@Dartman ; Yes parent raised or wild caught birds can bond with humans, but in most case there is an imprint made first. In the case of your birds there was no bonding to you until the one bird died which is a very strong emotional stress for a parrot and you were there, thus there was the opportunity for imprinting to occur and then there was a bond formed.

 

[LaSelva]

Domestication is a vast topic unto itself. When we talk about genetic engineering a complete picture takes into consideration the (well documented) unexpected, adverse side effects we've brought about in animals selectively bred for particular traits (ranging from pets to livestock). Genes perform multiple functions therefore a gene that governs a desirable physical trait were breeding may also control, for example, important social behaviors. Altering color (melanin levels) affects the animal's mental state as well as ability to respond to certain drugs. Temple Grandin's book "Animals in Translation" goes into great detail on this topic. In cases we have turned animals more aggressive (rapist roosters, or dogs that don't recognize social signals), made them insane (going back to melanin levels), and caused many health issues in them.

Descartes and Aristotle "wrote," or philosophised, that animals were unfeeling automations. Emotions were thought of as intangible (not anatomical or neurochemical) and therefore spiritual - it is what made humans god-like and elevated us from non human animals in the world. But the idea that standards for animal welfare are anthropomorphic seems a flawed one in light of how well mapped their emotions are today. Similar to saying that it's anthropomorphism to state that a non-human animal has a respiratory system or a circulatory system. We are not morphing the animal into human in these cases. Before science and modern technology I can see how the inner lives of animals may have been anecdotal. It's fact - and slowly becoming public knowledge - that we posess a shared anatomy and neurochemistry of emotions. In some cases technology has allowed us to see what they are dreaming! We are not as unique as we once thought we were in the things that we want and the emotional needs we seek to satisfy in life. I made a reference above to bonobos being able to articulate their desired rights. In addition wild animals have a repertoire of behaviors carried out in the wild that must be performed in the captive environment in order for it to be considered a good one. For species such as polar bears or marine mammals, which instantly come to mind, this is simply not possible.

The above (neurochemistry) and other facts comprise the science that animal rights/welfare is based on. In other words if they have what we have (consciousness, emotional needs, social attachment, pain, suffering, desire to avoid pain, stress, fear, etc.) then they should have what we have (rights).

On the topic of imprinting...

Five main stages to imprinting that overlap chronologically (they vary depending on species) are:

1) On parent. The blind chick will first respond to it's mothers calls. When it can see the parent it will direct food-begging behavior towards only the parent and eventually develop fear of anything that isn't the parent. Although "fear" in this case isn't quite what we think of it. As even at this helpless age young birds of prey, for example, will try to fight anyting that enters their nest.

2) On siblings. Can be a source of comfort and warmth to the chick or competition - where the chick will begin to mantle over or defend it's food from them.

3) Development of fear response. As imprinted objects become familiar, new objects expereinced are considered unfamiliar and feared. One can use habituation on an older bird in this case but it must be continuously maintained because it wears off.

4) Imprinting on future sexual partner. Derived from the image of the parent, or perceived parent - primarily it's the food bringer that determines this.

5) Environmental imprinting. Imprinting on nest type, site and habitat - based on where they are being raised. NY's famous Red Tailed Hawk, "Pale Male," was chased away from his initial nest choice (a tree) by crows. He subsequently built on the ledge of a building. All of his offspring have since sought to build nests on buildings. This was a question I had asked the local dedicated Pale Male watchers in Central Park myself. There is a strong correlation between the surroundings/type of nest in which chick grows up and the type it will choose as an adult.

The reason for imprinting is survival. Nature insures that important aspects of a birds future (and future of it's genes) aren't left to a learning curve. Hunting or foraging are not a part of imprinting but are instead learned and refined through experinece over time.

 

[SueA555]

I have bonded quite well with rescue birds. I don't think you need to begin with a new baby.

 

[GCChris]

Yikes well, I can say that if she is trying to discourage young people, being all sanctimonious and preachy is going to have the exact opposite effect than desired. Reading this kinda makes you want to go get the biggest, nastiest parrot just to say "sez you lady".
This kind of posting is seen a lot in dog-rescue circles too. People become so emotionally-invested, stressed out, and overwhelmed with trying to "save them all" that they end up hating anyone who owns one in the first place, and if you get a puppy or don't "adopt a rescue" then heaven help you. Sounds like she needs to disconnect from the internet for a good, long time and just focus on enjoying her birds. As with dog-rescue junkies, sometimes they end up spending so much time online 'ranting', sending emails and scanning classifieds for anyone who needs saving that the animals in their care don't get the attention they need...what the person is online complaining about in the first place!! Before long, they are on an episode of "animal hoarders" its sad but it happens. I think when we get stressed and sad we should just take a step back and remember what we loved about our pets in the first place.

 

[Wolf]

I tend to be the odd man out rather often due to my perspectives on things. I think that too much emphasis is being placed on the delivery and not on the actual message . I was not of the opinion that the party was overly stressed or unhappy with her birds or her relationship with them, so maybe I missed something. What I did note were things that we all need to be aware of and that the party was using some of her previous mistakes as an illustration to bring her point home. You all remember mistakes, we all made them.

 

[scoobdoo63]

For me, I waited a long time for my bird. Through a pet store. Not many cockatiels are around here at one time and most want to charge you 130$ for a new weaned at 7 weeks or you can buy a older cockatoo or macaw for over 500$. This pet store only charge 60$. We don't have bird rescue around here. I don't trust Craig's list.So in the mean time of waiting I researched and 're read things over and over..got my cage, food toys, etc ready only to find that my bird had died while in the care of the breeder, stuff happens.. So I had to wait again.. now if that isn't thinking things through I don't know what is. that was almost 5 months of waiting. I think at some point and time all our birds become a burden, a pain in our butt, we think omg! What was I thinking! Then they sing, cock their head and look at you or give you that sleepy eye look when you give them scratches and your heart melts..I'm home most of the time now.. but for a while there I was gone a lot 4-5 hours 3-4 Times a week. But when I got home I made sure I made bird time. If I was home his cage was open all day he would be on me or walking around.. I don't think you should impulse buy on any pet. It's not fair to them. I have had people say to me to..when they die they want to be my pet cause I spoil my pets.if you start having hateful / resentful ..feelings towards your pets then maybe you do need to give them up to someone who will love them before you end up hurting them.. just a thought

 

[SueA555]

You're right, scoobdoo. Birds need to be loved and cherished in order to be successful companions.

 

[Wolf]

No argument from me, love and respect can help heal many things as well, but if you are afraid of and resentful of the bird then it needs a better home.

 

[CStone]

I tend to be the odd man out rather often due to my perspectives on things. I think that too much emphasis is being placed on the delivery and not on the actual message . I was not of the opinion that the party was overly stressed or unhappy with her birds or her relationship with them, so maybe I missed something. What I did note were things that we all need to be aware of and that the party was using some of her previous mistakes as an illustration to bring her point home. You all remember mistakes, we all made them.

The actual message she is giving is that she does not believe parrots should be kept as pets. It seems like her reasoning is because she doesn't like parrot keeping. The entire article is her complaining about every aspect of it and how it stresses her out that she has to stop what she wants to do to take care of her poor bird. I wonder if the bird can sense the disdain she has for him. She even wrote that several times a week she regrets ever getting him. She gives him what he needs because she feels like she has to in order to fulfill the commitment she made when getting the bird, not because she enjoys it. I feel sorry for both of them. The points she makes about how hard it is to care for parrots has truth to it, but aren't they things we all deal with on a daily basis? I don't read many complaints around here. The people here laugh and joke about the time and effort it takes to maintain relationships with these animals, which is as it should be. For some odd reason, we enjoy the bites and the poops and the screaming.

Not everyone is cut out for having a parrot as a pet. That doesn't mean no one should own one.

 

[Wolf]

This is not what I get from either of the articles that she wrote. It appears to me that she cares very deeply for her parrot, but she is being honest about the things that she and her parrot went through together before she learned enough to relate to him in a loving and respectful manner, before she was able to get past the preconceived notion that the parrot was some how inferior to her or that she was more important than the bird. She describes the years of not giving the parrot credit for its high level of intelligence or its need for social interaction. These are not the same things that many here are seeming to get from this because of the statement that parrots should not be kept as pets by those who get them purely for their own entertainment and amusement. I really think that many here have misread these articles simply because they resent the statement and for no other reason.
After participating in the discussion and just prior to typing this out I went back and read both articles for the third time just in case I had missed something as I just did not receive the same message from this lady as most everyone else was getting and to be honest I still am not able to see it the way that the majority seem to see it. I see a very well written, well thought out article that tells me just how much and how deeply that she cares for her bird.

 

[CStone]

Her article doesn't specify that only people who want a bird for amusement shouldn't get one. She typed in bold letters, twice, that she no longer believes parrots should be kept as pets.

I do resent the statement that parrots shouldn't be kept as pets, and so should everyone who enjoys keeping parrots as pets, but that has nothing to do with my opinion on the tone of her article. I found it to be very negative and it sounds like she would have never gotten one if she could go back and do it again. I'm glad she has decided to dedicate herself to the bird, and I hope she does it with more joy in her heart than the article lets on.

 

[Perriewinkle]

I have been reading through her blog with anything that has "parrot" in it.. and I found this

Is it really hard for you sometimes, even with...

I'm not sure what is going on but I agree with others that she perhaps picked the wrong companion animal and hasn't taught it to be independent.

Seems like she feels guilty and refuses to rehome the bird to a place where it wouldn't be resented daily..

 

[Dartman]

Wow, I think she's overthinking every minute detail of her birds life, that's kinda sad. Nerd had his brother, when he died he eventually adopted me into his flock and was happy and playful till the end. I did occasionally worry about him getting old and things like that but we had games only we played together and he had his toys and beloved play stand and life was good. Yes it was a bit of a hassle when we would go on the rare vacation but we had family and friends that would come in and make sure he had food and water and set with him a bit every day so it was never a HUGE problem. I NEVER resented him one bit, he made my life better and I think he loved being part of our flock and the things we did that he could watch and be involved in.

 

[Tanya]

If you feel guilt for having a bird you may come to resent that bird. And when the resentment grows beyond your self control you may hurt that bird. And when the resentment is released in the abuse, all that will be left is a deeper feeling of guilt about the bird. It's a vicious cycle.

I'm not saying she's actively abusing her bird (though I can't say exactly what she means by the phrase "loosing it")... I'm definitely saying that her stress is most likely having an impact on the sense of well being in her little flock. And if life with your parrot(s) isn't neutral/pleasant, that is if the time spent is a frustration and not something that just is or is even enjoyable, a bird is probably a very poor choice for you.

Shoot, I actually LIKE it when Rhubarb is screeching in her cage because 96% of the time it means she's having the time of her life beating up a toy. The other 4% it means there's a fly/bee/moth in the room that must be exorcised IMMEDIATELY! And most days that insect paranoia of hers makes me laugh. I actually do enjoy her screaming aerial acrobatics because it means she voluntarily took flight for an exercise lap. Every so often I'm not feeling well and the screeching is too much... So I give her a long fly followed by some fresh veggies... And suddenly we have a very quiet girl.

It never occurred to me to feel guilty for having a bird. The choice to turn a wild thing into a captive was made long ago. I couldn't unmake it by opening the door and throwing Rhubarb out into the world. So we make the best of each day and learn to not be overly needy and to simply enjoy life together.

 

[SueA555]

That's really sad.

 

[msplantladi]

You're right, scoobdoo. Birds need to be loved and cherished in order to be successful companions.

as ALL animals do.

 

[msplantladi]

Yes alot mixed signals from her writing but also alot of truth-like so many others I had no clue 35 yrs ago what I was getting into but then i didn't know know a darn thing about having a baby either-lol
I do like her last paragraph -Seriously. You can’t get a parrot and expect it to behave the way mine does now. It almost certainly won’t. My parrot doesn’t behave this way because parrots are sweet and cool and want to love you, he behaves this way because I learned to be a less shizzty human who respects that he has a rich inner life and does not exist to serve my happiness.